We had a training for work recently, and the director (M, 60s) of my company invited us to his house for the training. I (NB, 35) arrived early and was the only one there apart from another colleague who is also an older man in his 60s.
When I sit down in one of the chairs, the director moved from the seat away from mine (yes, this happened) instead of beginning a conversation with me or something. It was super awkward because we were the only ones there and there were at least 15 chairs. It made no sense for him to stand up and move away from me except to avoid conversation…
He behaves differently toward me compared to other people in our company of any gender. With the vast majority of people, the director is quite relaxed and jovial, but his energy and behavior change automatically whenever he interacts with me: he becomes much colder, he doesn’t seem to joke around as he does with others, and honestly, he seems like he’s tiptoeing around me…
I don’t know what to make of this. I know last week he saw my LinkedIn profile, which is a bit odd to be honest. But the whole thing makes me feel somewhat uncomfortable because I know he treats me differently but I have no idea why.
7 comments
Wise man!
He doesn’t want a harassment lawsuit
[deleted]
Two reasons. One was stated. He feels you may cause him unnecessary problems in the form of a harassment lawsuit bc of you personality or he’s a boomer and doesn’t like “you people”.
To provide a bit more context: I’m Latinx, and I’m not accustomed to having people avoid sitting and talking to me–it’s actually considered in poor taste.
He wanted to control himself
Probably still not comfortable with NB individuals. For a lot of people these things are still novel and they don’t quite know how to behave especially since even though there’s de jure work place equality on the books socially people still talk and behave differently around men and women and a NB person is a question mark for a lot o people.