My name is Odin, I have a partner we'll call P. We used to care for eachother more than anything but recently they've been choosing people over me. For context, me and P both have DID and we did make it work.
They've been ignoring my explicit boundaries that I don't want to be in an open relationship, that I don't want either of our systems dating outside (which they agreed on) and I don't like being called certain things. (Babe, girl, etc) To which their alters do it on purpose.
I've argued about it constantly and tried to distance myself, it's gotten so bad where I've tried to block P multiple times but for some reason I always end up being the bad guy and begging for forgiveness. I feel like P owns my soul. I'm not allowed to get angry or upset or even have boundaries for myself or else they threaten to leave (and have before) and in our fights I always end up crying for them to not leave me.
I really don't know what to do, my friends say P is abusive. But I really don't know how to leave them because being alone is a lot worse.