My boyfriend (M34) and me (F27) have been together for the better part of a year. He's my first relationship and everything is still pretty much new for me. Our relationship is good, really good. I'm aware that most people think their love story to be special, but from what I've seen from friends and acquaintances over the years, the thing that he and I have is something else. We are so incredibly close , I – me as an introvert – never thought I would find someone to share such closeness, such calmness with.
However, he is an extrovert. While people often walk over me, they are just drawn to him. Whenever we go out he strikes up conversation, no matter where we go. His friend circle is huge, and his family does the full programm with birthdays, holidays and the occasional meet up. I adapted quite a bit for him already, being more social, being less of a quiet withdrawn klutz on the side. I don't mind. I enjoy company and new experiences. Some of them just leave me so burnt out that I have difficulties talking even to him afterwards until I am recharged again. I still don't mind. I can recharge, after all.
What I cannot handle is his outgoing demeanor all the time towards anyone. I discovered that I have jealousy issues, of which quite a lot are based in my own insecurity. Yet not all of them. For me closeness, touch and emotional availability are something special. And I don't agree with him putting himself in a situation where another woman thinks he might be available on any level. I don't agree with him rambling on with a newly made female friend evey day, day in and out, because this kind of availability should only be for the two of us. He just labels it as being friendly and open, but for me that is so much more. I am friendly and easy to approach too, because I'm kind, but in my demeanor I consciously draw clear lines that signal people not to flirt with me. He doesn't. He says it is his personality and I'm asking him to hold back part of himself.
Maybe I am. But am I wrong in doing so? I'm ignoring some part of my personality for him to accomodate his very extroverted social circle and family. Can I not ask the same of him?
Tldr: Me, introverted F27, having issues with boyfriend's constant extroverted attitude and resulting sitiations with other women.