I've been married to my husband for nearly 8 years. We got married young. I was about to turn 19 and I thought that we were meant to be together. I am now 26 and he's 28. I used to always want to be around him and spend time together. We'd cuddle before bed, go out on dates, go to church together, talk about our days and all that… And now things are different.
We are intimate maybe once a week and even when we aren't intimate I don't particularly enjoy myself. We don't do anything exciting or even really spend time together. Where we used to game together and watch movies together now we sit in separate rooms and just do our own thing.
My husband has expressed that he wants us to do more together again but I can honestly say I just don't want to. I do love him, and I love him a lot but most days I wish I was alone because I find more peace and enjoyment in a quiet and empty house than when I'm around him.
I haven't been thinking about being with anyone else or even considered stepping out of our marriage, I just want to be alone. I want the freedom to go out with friends or sit inside for a few hours before I spontaneously make plans.
I feel guilty for loving my husband but not wanting a future with him anymore. He's even brought up the idea of having kids within the next few months and I feel like that's driving me further away from him. When we first got married neither of us wanted kids and now he's considering them.
Is it wrong of me to just want to be alone? I love him but I'm not happy and I feel like we're basically roommates who have sex once every blue moon. Has anyone else experienced this? Is it wrong of me?