My wife justifies every interference and impulsive assumption with "I'm only trying to help." She interrupts. She derails my train of thought. She assumes I am going one way when I am going another.
I've said to her, stop assuming, observe, then speak. She gets angry. I do all the shopping, meal planning, and food prep (for 15 yrs whike working 65hr weeks), plus 50% of kid sport practices and games/meets yet She inserts herself in ways that make life harder, not easier. I am have strived to divide up tasks at home to divide mental labor fairly but she insists on intruding on things that 1) I have NEVER failed at or let her down on, and 2) that I do timely – all by her own admission. I have asked if she felt she could not count on me for the tasks I take on and she says "no." So if I am handling meals, house repair, yard work, bill paying, food shopping, and doctors appts 100% then why is she so goddamned controlling?
I think it is an anxiety and control thing but she won't get help and I can't fucking live with it anymore. She works 15 hrs/wk BTW.