So I’ve(38m) been seeing this bartender(36f) for about 3 to 4 weeks now, we’ve gone out a couple times and had a great time and I’ve seen her a few other times at the bar while she was working and I was with friends. The first couple of dates were great, had a little hiccup (she showed up to our first date an hour late), but I forgave her and we had a good time together. Communication outside of IRL interactions has been limited if not a little stale. Which has made me consider if we are truly compatible or not but, I wanted to see where things would go as she seems like the most mentally healthy person that I’ve met in a LONG time and I just assumed the slow pace (being completely different from my past relationships) might be a good thing.
Since we aren’t exclusive or anything close to that, I’ve continued to meet people and go out in case it doesn’t work out with the her. Well, I met this other chick out one night and went on a day date to a hotel pool followed by going back to my place to freshen up and grab an easy dinner before she headed home. When we walked into the fast casual restaurant, the bartender girl was sitting right there in front of me with some of her friends. Caught off guard I nervously said hello and had a small amount of chit chat before moving on to the service counter. (I could see on her face that she was at the very least suspicious, but more likely pissed, or some combination of both.)
Me and the new date got our food to go and went on our way.
Later that night I texted the bartender saying “nice surprise seeing you today”, to which she has not replied. So at this point I’ve resided to the fact that she likely won’t be reaching back out and I think I need to just move on but I’m kinda torn on the whole thing.
First, I really do want to see where things go with her as I like her in person and think the other communications will get better as we get to know each other.
Second, the new girl I was out in a date with was not for me and I let her know that we should just go our own ways and wished her the best.
So now I don’t really know what to do with regard to the bartender. Should I try again to reach out and explain things honestly, or just consider it over and take my licking?