EDIT 2: OLD means ONLINE DATING.

I was so sure OLD wouldn’t ever work for me to find someone who liked me for me, didn’t ghost, could communicate and wasn’t a complete nutball.

Don’t get me wrong. I met some cool dudes and not everyone was a monster by any means but for whatever reason things would fizzle out within a week or 2 no matter what. I was starting to become pretty jaded and self protecting. 4 months ago I used it and met my current boyfriend (M39). Who knows if things will work out in the long run but for now we are having fun, committed and talk about how deeply we feel about each other for such a short amount of time. More than once he has commented about what a miracle it feels like that we met… but I guess that’s the allure of on line dating.

I hope me and him work out for long term but even if it doesn’t, it has restored some of my faith in OLD. I had almost given up, really almost given up. I was like one ghosting away from throwing in the towel completely but I’m so glad I didn’t. So everyone on the brink, don’t give up.

Edit: wow! Thanks for the silver! 🙂

29 comments

  1. Three years ago I met my GF OLD. One of the happiest things that’s happened for my life. She’s my angel. It does happen, and there are good ones out there.

  2. Congrats!

    What OLD site did you use? What made this different from the other encounters? What made you match/choose him?

  3. Thank you for sharing your success story. It’s way too easy to get cynical and jaded, so it’s nice to see that it isn’t always a flaming dumpster fire out there.

  4. These hopeful stories warm the shriveled and blackened cockles of my cold, dead heart, and will undoubtedly provide some small measure of comfort when I die alone deep in the shadowed bowels of a dilapidated tenement.

  6. Great to hear! I’ve been so sure OLD won’t work for me either, and I don’t particularly like dating that way, but since it’s so hard for me to meet people in person right now, I’ve stayed on there and gone on occasional one-time dates just to like … practice how to, haha. Hopefully I’ll have similar success to you soon. Thanks for giving us some hope.

  8. Thank you for speaking to my last sliver of hope.
    Literally cried this morning out of frustration (years worth) and I feel like I may just have to take some time to myself and have a long reset. Wishing you two all the best.

  10. >things would fizzle out within a week or 2 no matter what.

    You guys are getting a week or 2??

  11. Could you give us an idea of how many people you actually met on a first date? How many proceeded to get a second date? I’m trying to get an idea of how much of a numbers game it actually is – and to figure out how it compares to my 1.5 first dates a year on average.

  13. met the love of my life at age 53 on Match, stay hopeful we are now married and both happy as we can be

  15. I was about to give up on OLD at age of 31. Then my current girlfriend said hello on Tinder (of all places) A year later, it feels like we found our soul mates if that’s a real thing. Love can happen in odd places and times

  16. Wishing you guys the best! I met my partner through OLD as well, though we both agreed it is a numbers game. We were very fortunately to meet each and clicked. We’ve been together almost 3 years and two kitties later. 😂

  17. Congratulations, OP! I’m happy for you!

    I found my perfect guy three months ago exactly at the moment I was going to burn all OLD’s off of my phone.

    Wishing you many more happy years together!

  18. Thanks for sharing! This cheers me up. I haven’t used OLD since a few years prior to the pandemic. I just realized the profiles and attitudes in my area bummed me out and I decided to either date people I meet without OLD (rare) or not date, but I’d love to meet my person, so it’s good to know that people do…all it takes is one right one!

  19. Nice, thanks for sharing, it’s always nice to hear of one that worked out among the sea of rejections. I think dating is a lot like job searching. The last time I got laid off I felt awful, it was like a part of my identity, a job that I’d had for over 10 years had died. I started working on myself and then started applying for every suitable job I could find. Rejection after rejection flowed in, and even more often than that I simply got ghosted. Then just as my unemployment coverage ran out and just as I was starting to feel a bit hopeless I received offers from not one but TWO different companies and landed a really great job. I’ve had some similar experiences dating, so for those who are feeling hopeless don’t give up yet.

  20. Thank you for sharing and giving hope to me. Just got dumped after something I thought was meaningful and it is a terrible feeling. Happy for you and best of luck!

  22. I was married for 3 years and and have been going through a divorce for the last 9 months. I’m new to OLD and it has largely been a very, very disappointing experience. This gave me hope.

  23. Similar experience. 36 year old guy here. Ive had horrible luck with OLD for several years, and my attitude about being single and lonely, at my age, has just gotten worse and worse. I had pretty much given up and resigned myself to just being single and lonely for the rest of my life. Then back in November, I randomly got a match on Tinder, she messaged me, and we clicked instantly, and are in an amazing relationship now. Ive never been with someone that treats me as amazingly as she does. Ive always hated the people that come into these threads and say all the clichés and talking points, but I’ve learned its true. If it can happen to me, it can literally happen to anyone.

  24. I was in the same boat as you last year after someone I was dating for a month ghosted me out of the blue I was ready to give up on OLD. Only after my best friend begged me not to give up did I decide to give it one last try, that’s when I met my current boyfriend. I too am hoping for success long term but am enjoying the present. We have been together for 7 and half months now. Fingers crossed.

  25. “I hope me and him work out for long term but even if it doesn’t, it has restored some of my faith in OLD.”

    Congratulations! The same people one meets online also exist offline.

    Ultimately, it’s not about *how* you meet but rather *who* you meet.

    Each of us has our own mate selection screening process and *must haves list*.

    Each of us has our own boundaries, “red flags”, and “deal breakers”.

    A lot of factors usually have to come together to create “serious relationships” such as mutual attraction, chemistry, compatibility, shared values, having a similar sense of humor, and libido.

    ***”Dating is primarily a numbers game…. People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That’s just the way it is.”*** – Henry Cloud

    Best wishes!

  26. Thank you so much for sharing this – it gives me and my single girlfriends hope to read threads like this one! It is very important to read information like this when you have been OLD for ages and nothing came to fruition.

    On a personal note – it is still very early days as we started seeing each other only 2 months ago – I am also now dating a guy that I met online with whom I have a really great connection with and who knows and MAKES AN EFFORT TO PLAN to spend time with me. For the context – I have been online dating for 2-3 years on and off, met great men via OLD, luckily none of them was a creep, but none of them wanted to actually date for a relationship/relationship with me. Last year have read a book called ‘How not to die alone: The surprising science that will help you find love’ – a very dramatic title I know – but it has been a game-changer for me. It allowed me to spot my own patterns in dating and also just really, really empathised that OLD is a numbers game and you CANNOT treat it personally. They are great women and men out there! DO NOT GIVE UP! xx

  28. Come back in a year and if you’re still together, I’m getting back on the horse (34 here and totally given up on dating. Just officially adopted my first cat. I’m content.)

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