okay so basically last night i was drunk out of my mind and was drunk texting the shit out of the guy i’ve been sleeping with
now dirty drunk texts are perfectly fine, i’ve done it before with him and whatnot but last night was super unhinged.
we were supposed to see each other at the end of the night but he was still not back in the city and texted me saying he was too drunk to get back and i was basically like duuddeee noooooo uber or something and was saying in many ways explicitly how i needed to get fucked and shit like (oh my god i’m MORTIFIED). i think i probably sent like 20 messages to his 5 and i called him like three times.
he was super apologetic (and so was i, i actually literally said sorry im being so selfish rn and then proceeded to continue being selfish and then he said it’s okay or something idk cause i refuse to read those messages again, i REFUSE)
and now im like awake and hungover and remembering all of this and im like shit shit shitttt
he’d honestly be perfectly in his right to never speak to me again because oh my god? like i said its not the dirty texts, its the fact that he’s like i cannot come back rn and i’m like mehhhhh…. come back anyway cause i wanna have sex! so yeah, he may not talk to me again it’s like a 50/50 chance at this point.
my thing is i’m wondering if i should reach out and apologize? because i genuinely feel soooo fucking bad about it.
but i also feel like i should wait to see if he texts me and Then apologize but he really might not ever do that again and i wouldn’t want his last impression of me to be that im a total and complete nutjob (maybe im exaggerating but i seriously am so embarrassed my god)
so… apologize now or just let it be and see if he reaches out?