I (26 M) have custody of my niece (7 F). I live with my boyfriend (34 M), and when I talked to him about taking my niece in, he didn’t have an issue with that. That was almost 3 years ago.
In the last few months, my boyfriend’s attitude towards her and me has changed. He used to be enthusiastic about us spending time together and would always be in a good mood when he got home from work, but since around last Christmas, he’s often irritated when he comes home and barely has any motivation to do anything. Every time I’ve tried to bring up his mood changes or ask how he’s doing he gets angry.
He never used to get violent during fights, but last week, I forgot to empty the dishwasher, so he broke some glasses and plates. He apologized afterward but also said that he blames me spending so much time taking care of my niece. I had just dropped her off at a friend’s house and didn’t have time to take care of the dishes before leaving.
Today, my niece came home with a bruised knee and elbow because she fell during recess. When my boyfriend found out, he got angry again and said he’d call social services because I’m obviously unable to take care of her. I managed to calm him down enough to explain what happened, but he said the next time he’d call them.
I tried to reason with him and explain that she’s a child and I can’t stop her from falling at the playground, but he didn’t care and just said that’s not his problem. I don’t know what to do now. I’m aware that I’m not a great parent, but I love my niece and I’m really trying my best. I don’t know how to make him realize that it’s normal for children to fall sometimes and that it’s not my fault.
TLDR: I have custody of my niece. Today at school, she fell off the swings and got hurt. My boyfriend threatened to call social services because he thinks I can't take care of her.