Me (f22) and my bf (m27) have been together for over a year and on most counts we're very compatible and it's been a really good relationship for both of us. The one thing is his ex (f26) (who I'll call A) who he's still in very close contact with after 4 years of dating. He's in close contact with many of his exes and they're on friendly terms but I'm only concerned about his behavior with A. For some context he was still seeing her, sexually , until 4 months into our relationship when I put my foot down. Since then he still tried to regularly meet with her until he moved out of our city and he and I have been in a LDR ever since. They text frequently and he only recently stopped calling her pet names (this was after me asking multiple times) (note: he's never used pet names for me either). He also texted her photos of their time together with some caption of "missing this" or "happy 3 years to this moment". They also call semi frequently, maybe 1-2 times a month but he claims that it's all in a friendly way. Most recently on her birthday he woke up early and spent a bit of time chatting with her on the phone as well. Another thing that unnerves me is that he's unwilling for us to meet and claims that it's toxic and overstepping boundaries if I reach out to chat with her / regulate his communication with her. He also has referred to me as "the jealous girlfriend" in his conversations with her.
This is my first real long term relationship and I'm not sure if I'm reading too much into this and this level of friendship is ok for him to maintain with his ex or what I should do to address this situation.
That being said on all other counts we're super super compatible, we have similar hobbies, similar goals, he's supportive of my pursuits, he's very kind and we have the same sense of humor. His parents treat me like another daughter and I get along with all of his friends. He's also a really good mentor to me since he's pursuing the same career that I would want to pursue
Thank you in advance 🙂
TL;DR bf takes with ex in a seemingly more than friends way and I'm unsure how to deal with the situation