Hello, my (40/f) husband (39) really wants to go to a swingers club. I’m opened to it, but I’m just so shy and nervous about going. I’m really curious as far as experiencing it, but I just can’t get past the nervousness. I keep telling him that we’ll go and when it comes down to it, I back out. I feel like a lot has to do with the fact that, being a woman, if you want to go to the area where there is “intamacy” so to speak, you have yo either be fully nude or in lingerie. I’m SUPER conservative in the way I dress. I feel like I have a nice body for the most part (he tells me that) but I’ve had things happened to me in my childhood that pretty much made me become very uncomfortable showing off even the slightest cleavage. So I just can’t get past the fact that I either have to be in lingerie or nude to go to that part of the club. How can I get past that? Any advice would be appreciated.


7 comments

  2. I’ve been to 5 clubs like this and they have never had this rule. It was always entirely optional what you wear, or don’t.

    Is there another option for clubs? This doesn’t seem right

  3. I think some really nice sexy lingerie would be the thing.That way you’re not nude.A sexy bra,panty,garter belt and stockings and maybe a strong drink before you go.Have confidence and hold on to your husbands arm for support and talk with him the whole time.

  4. I’m fairly certain you can dress how ever you’d like. You know, just like any other date night kind of attire

  5. Since your open to the idea (which I assume is more than just doing it to please the husband), I’d suggest you both go and NOT plan on going to the areas that require you to undress or wear lingerie the first (or first few) times. Get comfortable with the environment and get to know some other people before you jump into the “deep end”.

    If you end up not feeling comfortable enough at this club to disrobe but still want to experience the party rooms, you should find another club that allows you to stay dressed. Those are becoming more rare though.

  6. Hey there, contact the club and see if there is a required dress code. It’s unlikely they have one but some places do tailor their experience towards a certain ascetic.

    You could just go on a full on trench coat. You could wear whatever you’d like under it. And the people who see you just assume your naked under it.

  7. I love that you are open to this and considering satisfying some curiosity! Lingerie doesn’t have to be revealing 🙂 Find yourself a beautiful teddy and robe combo, and if the cleavage is too low, use a stitch or clip to clasp the two halves together for modesty! And remember, no means no and the club should have moderators to ensure everyone is following the rules and being respectful. Be sure that you only go to a club that has great reviews and you know has staff on hand for that specific purpose. Good luck!

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