Looking for life advice. Kind of ramblely.
Turning 22 this year. I have a history with depression. I’ve recovered quite a bit and I’m not on medications at the moment.
Don’t have any relationship experience. Never had sex. Never dated. I probably won’t date for a while. I just don’t feel good enough for anyone. (Unemployed, not in uni, can’t do chores/ still learning). I’ll be attending a peer support group soon – mental health related.
I only feel horny like once a month – the week before my period. I masturbate but my orgasm is pretty weak. I just squeeze my legs together in bed. No hands or anything. I don’t really know how to feel good while touching myself. No idea where my clit is. There’s some skin that feels over sensitive to touch (doesn’t feel good at all) but no bud. How do I feel good?
I want to explore with sex but… I’m scared of getting pregnant. Like terrified of it. I’m scared birth control will mess with my head. I don’t want to be suicidal again. A baby sounds even worse. Any advice on birth control?
I’ve read that couples have sex multiple times a week. Even days. I talked with my mum. She said she compromised with once a week when she was dating when she only wanted it once a month. Is that something I have to do to find love? It sounds awful. Forcing myself to have sex while not wanting it.