My (22M) girlfriend (25F) have been together for 2 years. She moved across the country for work and we are doing long distance for the foreseeable future. We’ve been long distance for the past 9 months. Outside of this issue everything else has been amazing.
Some of her behavior over last 9 months has been bothering me and I’m not sure how to proceed. She has developed a close friendship with this guy (26M). He’s part of her new friend group she’s made out there. They have a lot of similar hobbies and typically hang out at her place to work on these hobbies(I’m leaving out details just in case she sees this). They typically get drunk and, or smoke and he stay the night at her place afterwards. I’ve never had issues with her having guys friends and or anything like that, but this current dynamic of them always getting intoxicated together and him staying over at her place has really bothered me.
She also recently went to a singles night with her friends. I know most of her friends are single so I get why she ended going with them, but I still bothered me that she went to an event like that.
She’s been very forthcoming with all this information and in genuinely don’t think she is cheating. That being said, this behavior still rubs me the wrong and I find myself being annoyed whenever she mentions it.
She’s very much a free spirit and doesn’t see anything outside of actually cheating as wrong. To me they’re certain behaviors that aren’t really appropriate while in a relationship and are disrespectful.
Do you think me and her can make this relationship work with us seeing things so differently. And if so how should I proceed with dealing with this situation. Any tips or advice would really be appreciated.
TL;DR: While everything else has been great, my girlfriend's close friendship with a male friend—frequent late-night hangouts, intoxication, and him staying over—bothers me. She also has attended singles nights. I'm unsure how to proceed, given our differing views on appropriate behavior in a relationship. How can we can make the relationship work and how to address the situations