I’m sweet gentle and nice. That’s what people say about me at least.
One coworker even called me docile.
I used to be so outgoing and loud to the point people called me weird and annoying.
People feel comfortable touching my Afro or even talking over me. One time my boss ignored me when I gave input in a huddle.
I feel awkward sometimes in social settings especially work dinners and large social outing when I run out of things to say.
I want to be considered bold and someone not to mess with.
Growing up I was bullied a lot by siblings and classmates. Even when I stood up for myself I was laughed at or punished. Sometimes I wish I was a totally different person and not this mild mannered girl everyone sees me as.
I never stood up for myself much and I regret it to this day.
A rude boss can nag at me and I try to give input about an issue with a task I’m spoken over.
I feel like a social chameleon sometimes. I feel like I’m not really myself.
The only person I give attitude or my opinion to is my boyfriend.
My therapist said trauma can affect how we navigate the world and people have a sixth sense of who they can and can’t test. I want to be that person that people won’t test.