Hey Reddit! So I just recently started seeing this woman, and she and I have great chemistry. And we share much in common. As things have progressed we've begun to have conversations about what our preferences are for being intimate with our prospective partners.
She straight up told me that she orgasms really easily, and on a good day, she can orgasm 5-7 times within 30 minutes of intimacy, and having only 1-2 can sometimes leave her wanting more. This is an experience she would like to experience on a regular basis, daily preferred, if not, then 3-4 times a week in a commited cohabbitating relationship.
For me this is a total paradigm shift. In my opintion, in a perfect world both partners get ramped up at the same speed with a little foreplay together, share a simultainous orgasm, then engage in cuddling and some aftercare. Though in my actual experience, this has not been the case. Either I cum first or more seldomly she will. But It's not always that the stars allign that way.
Though as someobdy who wants to please their partner, and doesn't enjoy their own experience if their partner gets "left behind" so to speak, I'm no stranger to working hard to help my partner climax. And in past relationships, even with plenty of foreplay, I've found that there are times where I can't help but get there before my partner does. But not wanting to leav her her unsatisfied, I wind up performing other acts on her, if I can't stay erect long enough and PIV sex is no longer a viable option.
I know there are things like kiegel excersizes and special numbing lubricants and condoms to help men last longer in bed, And there is plenty of discourse here on reddit and elsewhere on the internet for men who want to do just that.
But I guess what I want to know is how I pace myself while engaging a in a physical relationship like that? I feel like the bar has simultaionously been raised and lowered for me. Raised because my prospective partner is requesting a number of orgasms that prior to having this discussion, I wouldn't have thought to be anatomically possible. But also lowered because she is somebody who can orgasm really quickly.
And what further complicates things is that she said in past relationships, oral stimulation hasn't really done much for her. Though I'm not opposed to using my hands, it was just never the preference of past partners. So PIV and Oral are what I'm most practiced in.
Like with any relationship, I'm sure this probably comes down to communication with one's partner and ultimately a little trial and error. But I guess I worry about getting caught up in the moment and not ever being sure when she's done, and maybe letting myself go to soon. And I know that a sexual encounter with a partner isn't about the "finish line" but about the conenction, and the build up and the journey to get there, and sharing a physical bond with your partner. That said, I want to ensure that I'm doing everything within my power to ensure the experience is ideal for both of us.
So reddit, any tips or suggestions?