Hello, guys. I (23F) have been going out with some people from a dating app to get an idea of what I’d really want from a guy if he were to be my bf. The dates were, on my part, expected to be normal encounters like getting to know each other, going to places, talking about our past.
I can tell you that every single date I’d been on, those men tried to touch me without consent, even on the first date. No questions asked.
I NEVER gave the impression that I’m even remotely interested in a relationship with any of these men, and I even stated hookups don’t interest me.
I went out with people of various ages, from 25 to 30. All of them were exactly the same. I was invited to their house to “cook” or do other “activities” in case we would “run out” of stuff to do outside and I was like wtf. What do you even mean by running out?
Anyway, it’s never happened to me to have a genuine connection without them lusting all over. One even asked me on our third outing to FULLY commit to him and not talk to anyone else ever.
I also learned my lesson with giving men location, since some of them waited for me obsessively in front of my house after I told them I’m not interested. I know this was a huge mistake on my part..
I don’t go for a specific kind of personality in men; I went out with people that I paid for and ones that had a lot of money and paid for both of us. There were engineers, professors, programmers, etc.. Various interests that were quite interesting and ones I had no interest in knowing more of. Overall, completely different archetypes.
I only want a guy I can connect with and I don’t know where to find that. I’m scared that at some point I won’t even get to say “no don’t you fucking touch me.”
The world out there is crazy and disgusting. Have you had this happening and do you know why that may be? How do you think I can prevent this from happening?
I also want to add that I’m bubbly, a good listener and am very into academics. I think I can have solid conversations about many topics and that’s why I just want someone intelligent and well-mannered to understand my needs of NOT being fucking touched while we have engaging conversations all night long.
Thank you, everyone.