Boyfriend and I (22M & F) were long distance 3 years, been living together for 2. When we visited each other while long distance, the sex was so satisfying, we orgasmed together almost every time. The sexting was great, nudes were great, but now having lived together for 2 years, I can say I'm borderline depressed from the dissatisfaction.
Over the past 2 years, our relationship has gotten continuously better, incl. romantically, EXCEPT for this issue. When we had small issues in the beginning I assumed it was our inexperience (we had sex only a handful of times over the years and were virgins beforehand) but even now, it's just gotten worse. He's still attractive to me, my sex drive is just as high as before, but I'm always left disappointed, it's getting to the point where I'd rather not try at all and just read smut to get my rocks off.
We're both trying, both to communicate better during sex and also relieve some pressure, but all I want is a good orgasm. I can't pinpoint the issue, but here are a few possibilities: I get super distracted during sex, sensation wise it doesn't feel super great (nothing cum worthy), and he kind of gets obsessed with trying to make me feel good (doing the opposite)
afaik, he says he's satisfied other than the fact that I don't enjoy it, and unless he explicitly says he doesn't want to cum, he does. we use vibrators and tons of foreplay so I don't think that has to do with it either. In general, I find myself fantasizing a ton about random scenarios and it's super easy for me to get excited, but when it comes to actually translating that into satisfying sex… not so much.
this is my best friend and I want us to be able to connect better through sex, especially since I could see him being my life partner.. any thoughts and tips are greatly appreciated