Hello everyone my (M23) ex gf (F23) were together for 3 years going for four when we mutually agreed to part ways for the better of our healths. Let me explain, during the relationship I felt like I was always respectful, loyal and loving towards her. Never once cheated or flirted with another girl, although girls did come talk to me at work I would always keep it professional. But that wasn’t enough for her, she would tell me she deserved better and always wanted to know where I was and what I was doing. She was Basically very jealous and insecure, and at some point got a bit controlling. During the whole relationship I would always try to show her that I only had eyes for her, and I would always tell her where I was and what I was doing to help with her insecurities, but it got to the point where it was just exhausting me. Long story short I made the hard decision to leave her and we agreed it was the best for us, keep in mind we love each other a lot, but it got to the point where we’re were just hurting eachother rather than helping.
While Brocken up we met up here and there through the first 6 months after the relationship ended, she wanted to get back together with me but I didn’t feel ready because I was a bit traumatized by all the controlling behavior and jealousy and I wasn’t quite ready to face that again so I let her know that and we stopped seeing eachother.
5 months later beginning of the year we met up again to see how we’re doing, she was saying she has changed and has been feeling so much better. I have also felt so much better mentally and physically, but I told her tht I wasn’t ready to commit to her yet. Keep in mind while we were brocken up I went through one of the worst times of my life and I was slowly building myself back up and started to feel good again. BUTT again I told her that we couldn’t keep seeing each other if I wasn’t ready to commit to her because I didnt want to waste her time even though I still love her.
That was in the month of Feb when we saw each other a full year after our official breakup.
It’s now 3 and a half months later (June) and I txted her that if we could see eachother.
But I txted because I just wanted to talk to her since she’s the only person I have really opened up to and felt like speaking with her. She agreed and we met up, we were kissing when she suddenly stopped to tell me she had been talking to another guy. I told her it was fine since I have no control of what she does when she’s single.
But long story short she wants to get back with me but idk if I can live past the fact she was falling for another guy and being intimate with them.
I can definitely see that she has changed into a more positive person, she works out now, she’s active and gets more sleep. But I would consider taking her back because she does look so much better than when the moment we broke up, but the fact that she kissed someone else is killing me. Keep in mind she’s my first ever gf, my first kiss my first love my first everything.
I’m not her first kiss but I am her first love.
I forgave her past before when we first met but idk if I can get past it again.
In the meantime while we were brocken up I haven’t talked to girls or checked my compatibility with other women. All I have done was work work, and self improvement.
I know this is long and it may be confusing but any help or thoughts are greatly appreciated.
TLDR my (M23) ex gf (F23) had a rough first three years of our relationship, I felt she was too jealous and insecure and a bit controlling so I decided to leave, we’ve been apart for one year during that year I have worked on bettering myself while she has as well, but during that time she tried talking to another guy but she said it didn’t work out because while she was with him she kept thinking about me. Moving to the present time I txted her we met up, she wants to get back with me but I don’t know how to handle the fact she was with another guy while I havnt been with any other women. Am I making it a Big deal or should I just give her another chance.