We’ve been together for 4.5 years. Things were pretty good for the most part, but the last 6 months have been extremely toxic since we moved in together. A lot of controlling on her end, and a lot of emotional abuse if I’m being honest.
I did a lot of therapy over the last few months and I had slowly been preparing myself for a breakup. We broke up two weeks ago and within two hours she reached out saying she regretted it. She made promises to change some things and I didn’t feel comfortable walking away without giving her a chance to prove herself. But even though she is making changes and a genuine effort to be better, I still don’t really feel any different.
I guess part of me was excited to be single in my 20s, and now idk what to do. I also feel like if I leave, I will end up regretting it somehow. I feel extremely stuck and stressed out, because I feel like I want to explore what’s out there but at the same time I would be getting rid of someone who genuinely cares about me, and I am worried I won’t be able to find someone else like that. I also feel rushed to make a decision, because I feel like my best chance to meet new people is in the summer while I’m not working and can go out more. Any advice?
TLDR: I left a toxic relationship, she promised to be better and genuinely is being better, but I still feel like I want to end things but I’m scared I will regret it.