At my workplace, there is a married woman in her 40s. We would often be playful with each other, sometimes touch each other, she would sometimes hide and surprise me. She basically acts like a young, cute girl. I am getting extremely attracted to her, but she often talks about her husband and kids. Any situation or words that could be interpreted as flirty or sexual in the slightest is getting indirectly rejected or she laughs it off. It's crystal clear that there is nothing going to happen, and I am just a colleague. And that is of course all fine and I accept it.
What is difficult to handle though, is that I can't just turn off the attraction switch. Unfortunately, I am literally unable to take distance from her. Whenever I have to move around the room, I have to pass her and see her. Sometimes she would smile at me or move up to talk or play around. I have to spend a mountain of mental energy to not do or say anything inappropriate, but it's getting to a level now where I am semi depressed when I get home and fantasize and daydream about her.
I am getting frustrated so that the last few days I am acting cold and ignore her looking at me and such. This is unfair to her, but I don't know what to do.
Please give me advice on how to handle this attraction and keep everything appropriate.