My boyfriend (20M) and I (18F) have been dating for about 10 months and honestly it’s been some of the most amazing months of my life. I love him a lot and I don’t doubt his love towards me either, however, recently we have been in a “slump” and it feels like things just keep getting worse and worse. It started one Sunday when I was going to a “religious ceremony” with him. I am not very religious and only attend these “religious ceremonies” because I enjoy spending time with him and know his family enjoys me attending them as well. My boyfriend is not very religious either so I think me going with him helps him tolerate going a little better. In short on the way there and in the parking lot before we went into the building he had yelled at me and basically repeated things like how I never listen to him and am never on his side. The yelling started because I was drinking my drink through a straw and it was making a slurping noise. I was heartbroken and so shocked he yelled at me and said such hurtful things over something so small. We had ended up making up and I attested his anger to the fact that everyone has off days but I was still very hurt over the situations and slightly confused by his actions. The following weekend there was an event in my town that I really wanted to go to. Normally I attend with my friends, but because everyone was out of town, I had asked my boyfriend to go. He was very vocal about not wanting to go but said he would attend anyways with me. I was very excited and grateful he was going with me. When we got there he essentially pouted the entire time and at first I was able to ignore it but after a few snarky comments my happiness and toleration flipped completely and I basically just said “fine. We can leave.” When he saw my mood changed he tried to “fix” it by asking me if I wanted to go into any stores or walk around some more (these are things I had said I wanted to do before we went) but I declined as my mood had already faltered and I was holding back tears. While we have had a very happy relationship I feel like he never wants to do things that I enjoy doing. I go anywhere with him even if it’s places I normally would never want to go. I still always remain happy though because I enjoy spending time with him. I have came to the realization that he doesn’t find that same happiness in spending time with me. This past weekend we have argued even more and I feel I was at my breaking point. His family even got involved and basically told him that he was in the wrong (except for his dad) but he still doesn’t seem to think he was. The final thing that had happened is that I had planned a date for next weekend and had told him about it this weekend as well. I had spent all of the prior week planning it and had put a lot of thought in it. When I first told him abt the third activity of the date he had said “no I don’t want to do that” and my heart broke. It was a baseball game that was happening in the city beside us that I had never been to. I understand that people have different interests and I’m not saying that it’s not okay for him to not want to go watch a baseball game. I just know that had his friends asked him to go he would. And I feel like he had totally neglected the thought I had put into the date. I semi blew up and expressed why this hurt me and I wanted so bad to do something different just once with him rather than sitting in his house “hanging out.” He apologized and said that he actually would enjoy going and would be happy to spend time with me. I asked multiple time if he was sure and that despite my wish to go I wanted to make sure he really wants to go and I’m not just forcing him. He said yes however this really did not matter because he texted me today and said he forgot that he told his friend he would be going to his bonfire that night. I was sitting in work and holding back my tears. I feel like I may be overreacting a bit but I’m hurt. Honestly, I wrote this as more of a rant than a question of what I should do. I basically told him to just forget about it and asked my friend if she wanted to go. He didn’t seem to catch how upset I was and I didn’t tell him. I feel like these past few weekends telling him how I feel has gotten us nowhere and I’m just lost. If anyone has any suggestions they would be greatly appreciated. Thank you 🙂
TLDR: My boyfriend can’t find happiness in spending time with me when doing things together that I enjoy.