I'm 29F he's 30M. We were together for 8 years, married for one and a half. I love him more than life. There were no arguments or disagreements. We were talking about having kids the next year. We both work, we lived at an apartment owned by his family. It was my dream life.
In April, we had a sleepover with my nephews and it was so fun. The next day, we were talking about how happy we were, planning the rest of the evening. He said he was having a nap and then we were visiting my parents. When he woke up, he told me he needed to tell me something and then my whole world collapsed. He said he didn't feel the same and asked for some time apart.
One month later he said he loved me and he would keep me loving me forever, that I didn't do anything wrong, that I was a wonderful person and that we definitely could have been more than happy together but he just didn't want to keep together. He swears there's not anybody else. He kept telling me that there's no logical explanation, that he doesn't understand either.
So, he left me. I'm living with my parents now. I've a wonderful group of friends and they all are taking care of me. I'm working, I'm studying to get a masters degree. Also, since this happened, I'm in therapy and taking antidepressants. I got a new haircut that makes me feel pretier and I got some piercings that I've been postponing since forever.
At the same time, I'm incredible depressed. I can't overcome this pain. I feel that I want to die. I'm out to be 30 and I feel like a failure. I've not told my extended family because I'm embarrassed, they all loved him. His parents, mines and my siblings, nobody understand what happened. I don't understand also.
I feel like my life is over, I lost the love of my life. I feel useless, disposable.
I know people can overcome this situations but I can't see me doing it. This hurts too deep.
Can you share some tips or experiences? Thank you.
TL:DR: husband left me all of sudden after 8 years together and I want advice on how to overcome the pain
Edit to add: apparently he had been thinking about splitting up for some month at the moment he asked me for some time. Despite that, he used to tell me he loved me, he showed me affection and we had plenty of sex. He hid it so well