so recently my boyfriend and i have been having really major arguments to the point where we’re both crying and i have to chase him home to make sure he’s ok because he was speeding. most of the arguments come from me thinking he’s ignoring me or from other small issues such as cancelling last minute or not asking me to hangout as often as i asked him. and if he did ask me and that day came, he would never tell me a time he wanted to see me and just basically makes it seem like he forgot to where i have to ask if we actually are hanging out that day. it bothers me because i babysit and usually they ask for me but i cancel on them for my boyfriend, and then my boyfriend ends up canceling on me. so those have caused arguments to the point where when i’m mad and upset about it he ignores me as a punishment. i’ll text him and he won’t reply and if i call him he won’t answer me, but i know if it were his friends he wouldn’t ignore them. i know his relationship with his friends are different, but if he tells me he sees me as his future wife, i don’t understand why he thinks ignoring me will solve any problems.
here’s the main issue, it’s got to a point where i’m so used to it happening i’m not even phased . last night he finally asked me to hang out and he even set a time and we decided to have a date night and go out to eat. when we were there we were talking and he was explaining to me how he ran over a traffic cone because i “forced him” to respond to me and called me toxic which made me feel horrible. (i usually just bug him to answer back, but he was busy working and didn’t reply for 5 hours but i didn’t text him once in those 5 hours to text me back). so i told him back what difference would it have been if it were ur friends begging u to text u back. (the day before his friends were texting him and bugging him to go watch fireworks together when originally, my boyfriend had asked me to go then forgot to invite me again because he was busy working, but he was literally able to answer the phone for his friends and go meet up with them.) so i said back why don’t u call them toxic then if they do the same stuff. at this point he got mad at me and goes why do i have to be toxic and said he keeps his relationship, his friends, and family separate, and didn’t talk to me . i went to the bathroom to cool off and came back to the table and told him i wanted to leave, we left and he began walking in front of me, not even caring about where i am till he noticed ppl were watching and said why don’t u walk with me, and i said why would i when you’ve been in front this whole time. we left the parking lot and i told him i didn’t want to fight and he said neither did he and i asked him if he was going home and he said yes and took me back to my car. we didn’t even eat our food at the restaurant and even our waitress noticed we were fighting because of how he was acting with me.
i got back to my car and started asking him if he’s ok and stuff, because previous arguments he’s told me if he acts weird to check up on him because he’s going through stuff he won’t even tell me about, so in the car he goes i’m fine and i go ok drive safe love you and all he says back is “you too” i go inside the place my car was parked at to pee and when i came out he was gone, he didn’t even wait for me to get back to my car. he didn’t text me the rest of the night and i already know he’s not going to text me and just ignore me till i chase him again. it really hurts me that he just ignored me and thinks not talking is going to solve our issues. i’ve told him that before and he says he wouldn’t do it if i didn’t make him, but he doesn’t even care to check up on me and make sure i got home safe. usually i keep texting him when he ignores me but now i don’t even feel like it because it really hurt that he called me toxic when i’ve been trying my hardest to be better for him and not assume the worst out of a situation and understand his side. i don’t even know if i would respond if he did decide to text me. it’s the next day now and he didn’t even text me good morning. i’m just so tired of being ignored as a type of punishment. he ignores me but won’t ignore his friends when they text or call, and they are always at his house and he’s always working with them. they even tell him that he hangs out with me too much and stuff when i literally only see my boyfriend once or twice a week. but when i say one thing about his friends he says i hate them and have something against them which is false. he told me his friends were at his house doing a bbq with his brother and i asked him if he wanted to be with them because i felt bad and he said no he wanted to see me, so i don’t understand what he expects me to think.
what should i do in this situation? do i not text him or wait for him to text me first? i’m just really hurt. i know he’s busy today working but he’s also going to be working with his friends. it sucks that he’s able to talk to them but not to me after last night when he just left.