I keep getting the cold shoulder from people and I don’t know why. I have autism so I have a hard time with social rules and cues.
For example, I (20F) went to a movie with a girl in my choir, and I thought we had a good time. However, her attitude and behavior changed towards me and I noticed she initiated conversation less.
Recently I started a doing a play in a town farther away from mine. There is a girl and a guy that I have talked to a bit and have been friendly with.
I tried really hard to make sure I wasn’t inserting myself into conversation, to stay on topic, not say anything weird, not accidentally overshare. Infact the girl might have overshared.
I also have been told in the past I can be clingy. I have realized this is because once I find someone who is nice to me I tend to stick by them a lot. So the next night I tried to sit more by myself. I wanted to sit on the side of the stage that I most often go on, and the girl I had been talking to the other night happened to be on that side so I was waking in the row behind hers and was going to sit farther away from her. However she said, “Are you going to sit by me?” I couldn’t be rude and say no, so I did.
The next rehersal she didn’t say hi to me or look at me or interact with me like she had in previous rehearsals. Neither did her friend.
This type of thing happens to me a lot. I have been working really hard on my social skills. I try really hard to make sure I’m listening and asking questions and showing interest. I used to overshare a lot so I have worked really hard on that too. I do struggle to initiate conversations because now I don’t know what is ok or isn’t ok to talk about.
I also have chronic conditions that require me to mask, although everyone there have not said anything and have for the most part treated me the same as others.
TLDR: I used to be awkward and oblivious to social norms, now I am likely still a bit awkward but more aware of social norms but people seem to be put off by me after 1-2 interactions.