I (32f) have been with my husband (32m) for 4 years and married for 1. We have a great relationship and he is so sweet to me. He cooks me dinner daily, takes great care of our pet, and rubs my feet lol
My issue is, I am an emotional person so I tend to cry when things go wrong or if I'm overwhelmed with things. I just need a bit of time alone to gather my thoughts and simply.. feel. I always communicate this to my husband (the need for space in these moments) in a calm and respectful tone. He never listens. I blow up and then things become about why I'm mad and I didnt get time to process what made me cry in the first place.
I will say, he does this with the best intentions. Yesterday this happened and while I was asking him to leave he said "I just love you so deeply and want you to be okay" .. I said "I am okay I just need time. Please" he seemed to understand and kissed my head and left. I bit later I look behind me and there he is staring at me from the door. I got so mad but the type of mad where you see red and not cry harder. I said "why can you never respect my boundaries?" And he apologized again and went downstairs.
Anyways, I went downstairs where he was and told him I was very upset with him. He said he was confused as to why and "who wants to cry alone?" .. I told him that would always be my decision to make.
I know he wants me to fall over and cry in his arms, but he never let's me actually get to that part. He hovers even after I beg him to leave me. I don't know if this makes sense, but .. I just want moments that are mine and that I am able to share when I'm ready.
I'm not sure if this is even a problem or if I need to grow up or if this is just what marriage is, but this exact thing has happened a minimum of 6 times.
I don't know why I'm writing… maybe to vent or for advice…