Why are guys so incredibly confused when I compliment their looks?

37 comments

1. Bc men don’t get complimented as much as women

2. Doesn’t happen often catches us off guard

3. Hard to tell depends on the situation they are either shy taken or not interested

4. For a lot of men, it’s a brand new experience. It probably feels like you’re speaking a foreign language to them.

5. For me, it hasn’t happened often. The few times it has (usually when I was a lot younger like middle / high school) it was followed up as a joke and they then made fun of me. So, when I get a compliment on my looks, my defenses go up and wonder if I’m being played somehow.

6. Some guy is getting compliments?! I want one!

7. Compliments cause our brains to short circuit. It’s just more obvious in men cause we’re less used to it. The Oatmeal has a short comic explaining the phenomena.

8. Because guys aren’t complimented much. It brings to question if someone wants something out of you.

9. Some men aren’t used to it, others aren’t aware of their value/looks as they never get positive reinforcement. Nowadays if a person compliments a dude they might be afraid it’s a trap, with all the #metoo stuff and other such “movements”. You’d think it’s an easy thing to get around but especially younger men have no idea what it’s like to just be complemented without it being a romantic approach, because they are lonely and have very minimal actual physical interaction with people. It’s a generational issue as well as a social one.

10. Probably because men usually get one compliment a year

11. It happens so infrequently we think we are being teasing or Manipulated

12. Because 9 times out of 10 we’re only complimented with an ulterior motive

13. Came here to echo what almost all men have said. It’s a rare phenomenon, especially when compared to ladies. Whether it’s looks, intelligence, personality etc. It just doesn’t really happen all that often to a *lot* of guys, even when they are all of the above. Socially, men aren’t really considered while it’s expected that men compliment the ladies. Ladies have also gotten to the point that men fawn over them with no real need to reciprocate.

14. Even as a fairly cute guy – the last time a woman that wasn’t already my friend – made a compliment on my appearance was March 2018.

    I’d be hard pressed to think of one before that.

15. I had a girl ask my if my freckles were real and then complemented them it’s rare for dudes to get complements but we certainly appreciate them

16. Because most men aren’t used to get compliments. Unlike women where it’s pretty normal for them to receive them.

17. Welcome to men’s thug dating world

18. Men usually don’t get compliments, and if they get some, then there is usually some dark ulterior motive behind them (prank, fraud, etc). Statistically it’s safe to never take compliments to heart, especially from women.

19. Because I’m ugly as fuck

20. For a lot of guys it rarely happens outside of an SO. For some not even there. When it does happen, they’re often being buttered up for something. When the other shoe never drops, confusion ensues.

21. Men typically are not complimented nearly as much as women are. So whenever we do receive a genuine compliment, it can legitimately catch us off guard at times because we’re not always sure how to react to such a thing.

    Personally I used to get more compliments actually when I was in better shape and had hair on my head. And it would always be an instant confidence boost and brighten up my day. Now I’m working on getting back in shape, and trying to see if getting my hair back is a possibility but I don’t have a lot of hope for that one.

    I think if I did end up ever getting told I look decent again even without my hair, I’d probably never forget that moment as pathetic as that may sound to some.

22. Because it’s very rare.

23. I just straight-up don’t like getting compliments.

24. Unless I’m specifically dressed up for special occasion, I would assume that the person had ulterior motives.

    *Are they buttering me up for a favor? Is this a prank? Are they going to rob me?*

25. Men don’t get complimented much by other men.

26. Men don’t get compliments as often as women

27. It’s usually because I expect a joke afterwards, since that happens quite often to some men.

28. Women are very hesitant to compliment guys. Like I’ve seen girls compliment guys behind their bavks smh, and it’s for good reasons sometimes (people don’t want their compliments misinterpreted as something more) but it’s to the point where a man will likely hear less than 1 compliment a year (which reinforces the feeling that when he hears one that must mean something more). It would be less awkward for everyone involved if complimenting men was just more normal and frequent.

29. Because we are ugly. Then waiting to know why you are lying. Then is this maybe just some joke. Last is what did I miss?

30. It’s not on our agenda.

31. Because we aren’t used to being complimented, especially by a woman that isn’t a grandma or a mother.

32. It’s uncommon for most guys.

33. Its rare and usually not needed.

34. It rarely happens. If it does happen it’s usually a scam.

35. Probably they know you don’t really mean it and you are just saying it out of courtesy.

36. because you didn’t say ‘no homo’ before you said the compliment.

    some dudes need that comic relief

37. most men get about 2-3 compliments their entire lives before they’re married.