My husband and I got married very young, 19 and 20. We are both still college students making our way through. We will be 21 and 22 this year. We got married on a whim at the courthouse early in college for financial reasons and we had been together for almost 5 years. There wasn’t anyone to wed us at our courthouse, so we just found a nice dude on facebook to do it. He signed our marriage license, we didn’t do vows or I do’s. Just stood in front of the courthouse and we were legally married.
We probably weren’t actually ready to get married, but we did it and it only made our relationship stronger and made us love each other more. It was my idea so I can’t be upset that we did it. I am glad we’re married and that we love each other just as much and more than the day we got married. That being said, one of my best friends is getting married this summer and I have been heavily involved in the wedding process. It’s made me realize how much I missed out on. I always said I never wanted a ceremony anyways but now I feel different about it. I wish I could’ve had a proposal, a combined bachelorette party, a wedding shower, a ceremony.
I’ve talked to my husband about it, and he’s always willing to do whatever I want, he loves me. But we both feel weird trying to do all of that now, since we’ve almost been married for 2 years. It just feels too late. We never actually formally announced that we were married, we just kept it to ourselves and close family. But word spread quick and most people know we are married now, which is fine. But I don’t think he wants to propose to me… it’s a silly thing. And I get it. We’re already married so a proposal is just redundant. But I keep feeling sad that I never got that like everyone else.
Basically, would it be weird if we DID have a small wedding ceremony? Bach trips? A wedding shower? Would it technically just be a vow renewal… even though we never said vows? We will both have graduated college within the next 2 years, would that be a good excuse for not having a wedding? I just feel so silly doing it. It feels too late, like everyone will think we’re just asking for attention and gifts.
TLDR; We decided to get married young, no wedding. Now I’m involved in a friends wedding and feeling kind of sad and like I missed out on a proposal and all of the traditional wedding events. I want to have them, but my husband and I feel awkward doing it because it feels too late.