I avoid men but I also want to date and find love

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I was a victim of asault when I was a teen. Since then I avoided men. I was scared of them and scared of everything sexual. I am in therapy since 2018. I went to a few dates in the last 4 years and even kissed a guy and made out with him but I couldn’t bring myself to do anything more. This was all in 2019 and also because of covid I kinda got stuck. My avoidance became even more intense but at least I became much more social outside a romantic/dating situation. I joined a sports club and have a job where I communicate a lot. Therapy helps too, but my therapist is now on medical leave so I don’t want to text her what happened to me.

I work in a building with 5 companies. Almost daily I cross paths with one guy who is good looking but I never thought more about it. Just, well, nice body/face. Nothing else for months. As I said I see men as something I want to avoid. But on friday I saw him with his wife/girlfriend. She was upset and sad and he took her in a tight hug and kissed her forehead. That image made my heart beat faster. Since Friday I keep obsessing over that image and for the very first time since the tragic even in my life I found myself day dreaming about a man. I even pictured me with him in bed. Trust me this is a looot. I did some exercises with my psychologists in virtual exposure and it was hard for me to imagine a guy is touching me. And I naturally imagined me having sex with him, cuddling with him. I am more than confused. I am terrified. What is happening? Am I obsessing over a guy or that kiss on forehead was something that for once was bigger than my fear, my avoidance. I never cared for him. I barely noticed his existence until I saw him kissing her forehead. BTW, I knew he is with someone. It is not the first time I see them together. Please, any advise is great.