Hello, first I want to give some type of introduction so you can understand my confusions and lack of social skills.I am 24F, I'm an introvert with autism. I have Asperger's which means I am overwhelmed and over stimulated sometimes by too much social interaction. When I picture my days off it includes being at home alone binge watching anime or playing video games. I have had friends in the past but most friendships don't last because the people would expect me to go out constantly and hang out but it was draining for me.
I recently started my first job and a coworker sat by me and kept asking to get to know me. It's a high paying office job. I started avoiding the coworker because I genuinely just wanted to go to work and come home. No extra strings or more exhausting social interactions at work. But eventually I gave in cause they wouldn't stop trying to talk to me.
This person calls me "bestie" and is very clingy to me. Calls me during work, after work, before work as soon as she wakes up at 6am and even on days off work. just to sit on the phone and chat about life and work which was cool at first. I felt bad because it seemed like she really valued me and clinged to me more than I did her so i felt guilty and always answer the phone to not hurt her feelings or come off as rude.
I kinda thought we had somewhat of a friendship until I noticed she approaches everyone like this (forces "friendship" and social media exchange) and calls multiple people best friend. So I realize she's not dependent on me and feel less guilty/inclined to pick up the phone. I am one of her many "besties" and she probably only hangs around me so much because I have weak boundaries and pick up the phone and allow her to invade my space with her endless venting while others hang up without guilt.
I say this because i feel like some people just enjoy hearing themselves talk. They want to vent and let whatever they have out even if the person on the other end of the phone is not responding, They just enjoy talking at people.
When we're on the phone, she just talks about everything she's done in the day step by step, vents or talks about her problems. We rarely speak about me and when I talk about something I've experienced she doesn't react or the response is an effortless "oh dang"… "anyways, back to me and my problems" type of response. I'm always offering advice and help but i can't remember a time she's given me advice or help.
I'm curious if this is how friendships work? How often are you on the phone with someone who doesn't fully value you as a friend but a coworker or some weird part of her bestie collection? Am i being jealous and weird and over valuing the word "best friend"?