TL;DR: How do I Tell my best friend that he stinks really bad and it is affecting others perspective about him.
I, F27, have been best friend with Rob (M33) for 7+ years. Rob was never a clean or neat person. I have seen his house (even bathroom) dirty in our university days. It bothered me and I outright told him about it. However everytime he excused himself saying that he is very busy with studies or roommates are not contributing.
Basically I think Rob is a person who never takes responsibility for mess in his house. But as both of us usually hang out either at my place or outside it didn't bother me that much.
Cut back to now. It's been 4 years since both of us started working. Rob showed improvement in cleaning in first 2 years (meaning he started vacuuming his house once every month rather than once every 6 month). But still, it was improvement.
However from last 6 months, Rob started stinking really bad. Even when we meet up right after he showers. I indirectly suggested him to use nice deodorant however his bodily smell is so bad that sometimes it outperforms deodorant smell. Or if we are spending half a day then deodorant wears off.
Recently I've been to his home after almost 6 months. It was MESS. Bathroom was cleanest place in the house. After asking him he said that he was busy with work for last few months. I know he could atleast get some time every week. But he'll never admit to his faults.
Few more things that I've noted about Rob:
1. I think he might be suffering from some kind of mental health issue which he himself doesn't want to accept. Reason is, I've been through depression myself. I used to feel lethargic to do anything (but I was never unclean or smelly). I kept my room untidy.
He lost 15+ pounds in the span of 6 months. I talked with him about it. He mentioned that he's not able to go to gym regularly for last few months. Also from 7 days a week he orders uber eats for almost 3 days (6 meals) plus eats leftovers meantime. I think this is concerning. Please let me know if it is.
He's losing his hair and he has lost luster of his face. I think it is related to his diet.
I want advice on how should I approached him about it politely? Rob doesn't take criticism nicely. Like I said before, he usually either brushes thing off or says that I'm imagining things. Sometimes he get offendded as well. It has become difficult to be in the car with him due to smell. Not even our common friends also started noticing about it. I don't want people to talk bad behind his back when he is clearly at faults.
Rob is a very genuine person and a very good friend. I don't want people to criticize him. But it has become extremely difficult to hang out with him now. Please advice.