My partner and I have been together for almost four years now, of course during that time there was a period where we split. He’s always talked about how hypersexual he is, that’s he’s a hardcore switch, blah blah blah. Now me, I’m somewhere on the other end of the spectrum, towards asexual/demisexual. I have trauma surrounding sex and I always try to make him known to that.
Of course, he says he understands and still gets upset when I get upset sometimes. Most of our sex involves me giving to him, and maybe there’s a %25 chance I might get a little something too. I can go for a long time without feeling the need to do something, but when I do it’s really hard for me to get the courage to ask. And you know why? He always shoots it down. I even ask him to maybe touch me while I get off next to him and he still makes an excuse ‘i have to work today.’ or ‘i would want to do it right.’ And then he mopes when I tell him I’m just going to go to the bathroom and get off instead.
I don’t know. I’m exhausted from being the dominate one all of the time. I’m starting to even wonder if he’s attracted to me in that way or if he just wants a mouth to get himself off with. It’s really messing with my head.