Do men prematurely imagine what dating a girl would be like?

36 comments

1. Yeah i think so

2. We imagine… the good part of the date… if you get my drift 🙂

3. Yea

4. There are girls I’ve liked who I’ve fantasized about, yes.

5. Yup of course

6. Yeah.

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   Hate when that happens tbh

7. I do. I try to picture how my mom would react if she heard i was dating em. My dads a sucker for a pretty face though so i cant use that as a metric

8. With every woman of appropriate age, description, and interests. I imagine the highs and the lows, depending on what I know and learn about a particular woman.

   Quick edit: except I’m not basing these opinions on *dating apps* because those are garbage. The only way to get to know a person in the ways that lend me to casting my imagination is through *actual* interaction.

9. Honestly the first time my high school sweetheart told me she loved me I just thought about the lastnames our children would have and how they sounded (in our country they get both). And you know what? I think they sound pretty damn nice. So yeah I think about the future sometimes.

10. Imagine dating? No. Imagine you naked? Yes.

11. Sometimes we imagine what it will be like on a Tuesday evening, when we were too busy to eat and we haven’t had time to wash a load of towels and you are mad about being up so late. We imagine if you are the girlfriend who is fun to be around while we wait for the towels to dry or if you are going to be a royal bitch who suddenly remembered everything wrong we ever did and decide to yell that at us.

12. Absolutely

13. personally I prematurely imagine everything idk about other people

14. Only sort of. I’ll imagine like, a first date and what her face might look like if I can make her laugh. I think I’m supposed to say I imagine having sex with her, too, but I don’t, really. I have a hard time picturing that very vividly if I’m being honest.

    One interesting thing is if a girl is really far “out of my league,” so to speak, I actually can’t picture her on a date with me. I don’t think it’s a self-esteem thing. I just don’t really have a frame of reference to make the mental image. So my imagination fails me if she’s too hot.

15. Sometimes, when I actually know her. Never had it happen with a girl who was, so far, just a pretty face to me.

    They’re also usually much more vague than the stories I hear of women’s fantasies in that vein.

16. I only start imagining a future with a woman after I’m interested in her and know her personally. I don’t do that with pictures I see online.

17. Not any more, no. That way lies danger and heartbreak.

18. Nope. I’ll just be hit harder by the rejection if I did.

19. Yes, but not based on looks/first glance.

20. bro we plan wedding and growing old together by just a single touch

21. I don’t since I stop myself from catching feelings/feeling romantic attraction and sexual attraction since all of these only lead to pain.

    You also need to be able to imagine this supposed woman being into you, which I am incapable of. So even if I wanted to imagine dating a girl, I just wouldn’t be able to.

22. Yeah, pretty common thing

23. Yep

    Trying to kill that ability as we speak :p

24. No. I used to but that’s a good way to build up feelings for someone who 99% of the time won’t even notice you exist. I live in the moment so I don’t get attached. It lessens the sting of being rejected, which lets face it is going to happen a lot (or they’ll just be low effort conversations and die out because she was never interested in the first place)

    Well until I actually get to the point where I think I want to date them and can ask. Then I have to actually plan something.

25. When I was looking to find a partner. I didn’t imagine dating them – as in going out to dinner or a movie. Instead, after talking to a woman for a bit, I did a quick assessment of “Do our interests mesh?” Stuff like “she says she likes to spend every weekend preparing for running marathons – do I see myself wanting to be part of that?”

    If I didn’t see us having compatible interests, I courteously let the current action with her end in a polite civilized way, and moved on. If I were using a dating app, I’d do that same assessment with what they say about themselves in their profile. So it’s more about “do our lifestyles mesh well” vs. “do I imagine dating them?@

26. I often used to, but it’s not a good idea. When I used to OLD I was disappointed most of the time if I get too much in my own head. Just let things play out.

27. I am married. But I remember being like that with girls I liked before. But never was into online dating/apps so I would not really know.

28. i created whole seasons of story lines bruh…

29. I think everyone does this, right?

30. Of course. How do you think we choose? You have to run a simulation, see if it works.

31. I’ve messed up and even imagined marrying chicks I just met . Nothing to do with how they are , just the curious mind. We make up scenarios in our head just like you guys.

32. *fucking* not dating. Dating is a secondary thought and marriage/kids is neverdairy

33. Yes. I did this towards a woman at my previous job (who ironically showed so many signs she was into me too) so intensely that I would try to avoid her because I literally couldn’t carry on a convo with her nor think straight. It messed me up big time.

34. Hell, in the past I’ve went straight past that and imagined married life with kids if I liked the woman enough. Pretty sure plenty of dudes at least do the dating phase.

35. We imagine what it’s like to have sex with them before imagining what dating them is like.

36. Sure, sometimes it’s I wonder what it would be like in a good way, other times it’s wonder what it would be like in a, terrible train wreck glad I’m not with her way.