TLDR: I feel a lot of guilt, or like I’m going to regret not spending time with family (boyfriend included) when I had the chance.
I don’t know how else to word this feeling…
Between work and life in general, I feel like I’m losing quality time with both my parents [60s] and my boyfriend [M27].
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years and we’ve lived together for almost 3 of those years now. Essentially, we’ve started, I don’t know, “beginning our lives” and I can’t help but miss my parents. Or when I am with my parents, I feel like I’m missing out on spending time with my boyfriend. It’s a very upsetting cycle that I’ve recently noticed and I just want some insight on how to navigate being an adult.
How many of you have had similar feelings? What did you do to balance the time you have with the time you don’t??
3 comments
Maybe you need to learn to enjoy the moment, whoever you are with at that particular point of time. Focus on them
When you’re with your parents, focus on being and enjoying time with them. When you’re with your boyfriend, focus on that separate relationship. Make sure you’re giving adequate time to both parties and maybe have quality together time for all of you.
You’re definitely not alone. I’m in my 30s [F] and live an eight hour drive from my parents. I have lived away for over 13 years but sometimes I still get pangs of what I call homesickness, but I think it’s more feeling sad that I can’t pop round to theirs for a cup of tea, can’t do their shopping or just rest easy knowing they’re physically close by. I like the advice from others about keeping in the present – sometimes that can feel difficult but it will help you feel more in the moment.