Hi everyone,
I love updates, so I figured I should give one to my only popular post instead of just my usual lurking.
Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/s/9gICXA6jMe
It's a bit hard to remember details after 5 years, but we had a big blow-out some time after I posted this. I snapped at one point after he pushed the issue when I had told him I didn’t want to talk about it, and ended up telling him how mean that was (aka the later comment: "well, I can't do anything about that, I think Julie is the perfect ten") and how insecure it made me. He realized that the comment was unnecessary and apologized.
However I just got into a funk for a couple of days after the confrontation, partly due to the comments on this post that were quite harsh. He got super worried when I was subdued after 3 or so days, and he apologized profusely and said he would work on his stubbornness, communication, and be better at complimenting me. In addition, he explained that the comment was partly due to the style of communication he and his ex had, where where each of them just dug themselves deeper into their positions when they had any sort of disagreement.
And I'm happy to say that he did improve massively. He is still stubborn and can still quickly go on the offense in discussions we have, but we are now married (he proposed), have a 1.5-year-old boy, and we are happy. This remains one of our biggest argument to date.
Sidenote: I changed jobs, but so did Julie, and we ended up at the same firm – again!! So we are still colleagues, but there are 1000+ people at our office so I don’t see her as much nowadays. I still catch myself interested in what she posts on SM, but that’s about it. I rarely think about her or this situation.
TL;DR: we are happy, got married, had a baby