Hey all, strap in this is a long one. So my friend and i(27F) have kinda had a rough time this year. Laura and i moved in together in 2022 because she was having issues with her brother and wanted to move out of her parents. She talked me into buying a condo with her. Initially i didnt really make enough to put anything in savings so i started looking for a new job. Laura recommended her job because it pays well and we could have the same days off then. It was a different shift but we overlapped for an hour. I applied and got it. A couple months later my boss said he almost didnt hire me because Laura told him i could be stubborn. I confronted her about it and she said she didnt mean stubborn in a bad way and he took it out of context. I let it go and we continued as nomal for some time. I recently started dating in the beginning of the year. Laura made some comments about dating, how its hard and how a lot of guys suck, but i felt like i was in a good place for a relationship. I met my current boyfriend in February and things with Laura went downhill.
Before even meeting him she would make comments like "Oh he sounds like a golden child, thats a red flag you know? Oh hes working on his degree? Why did it take him so long to get one?(This one hurt because im currently working on my degree) Honestly he sounds like an r/niceguy, id be careful. I dunno he sounds like my exes, red flag. Well your pretty stubborn in general so if you guys fight it wont go well. I just dont think hed support you" I didnt confront her and just stopped bringing him up, but then shed bring him up and ask if we were still together, did we break up, so on and so forth. The first time i spent the night at my bf's she texted me in the morning saying she slept like shit and kept waking up thinking i was coming home and didnt manage to fall asleep till 1 and she had work at 6. I felt like she was blaming me and said sorry and she said its whatever. She then came up with rules for him. "He can never move in, its a threat to my livelihood. He cant use our shower. You two have to date for 3 months before he can come over. Hes not allowed in our place if your not there. No sleepovers without telling me. Hes not allowed to have a key untill youve dated for at least a year."
I agreed to the rules, somewhat reluctantly because i also owned half the house and it seemed unfair. I waited exactly 3 months and then invited my bf over. The whole time Laura was odd and almost stand offish? Then afterward she said "I dont even think he likes you, he doesnt look at you like he does," meanwhile my toher friend was texting me saying it seemed like her really liked me and was a good guy. I let it go. Then Laura started dating. She met this one person called Alex. They dated for about a month and a half before we planned a board game day with some friends. She told me she wasnt serious about Alex but that aslo she was inviting Alex over for our game day. I was at work when she texted me so i responded and asked why i had to wait 3 months. She said she cant change the past and why would i start an argument before we invited people over? She said "Fine ill never date again after this so it wont matter again happy now? I wont bring over Alex." I told her not to give up on dating and ok. Then the next day i was having brunch with some friends and my bf and when i get home Laura was in the entrance and said "Suprise! This is Alex." And there they were. I didnt say anything, greeted Alex, and once again let it go. LAura broke up with them the next day.
Well i started to feel suffocated and trapped by her, i saw her everyday at work, i saw her on my days off at home, it was a lot. Then problems at work happened. I made a mistake by switching up two items. Other people have made the same mistake, no big deal. Eventually our boss sends an email saying double check stuff. I was joking with a co-worker about how she forgot a part in a set and she went "ooohhh but you switched to!" and then Laura went loudly infront of everyone "Ya, thats why our boss sent the email to everyone, because of your mistake". She didnt sound like she was joking and i was hurt but let it go. She was then made Lead at work.
One day a co-worker under Laura started yelling at me saying she knows i dont like her why would i talk to her. Laura witnessed this and said nothing. Both me and the co-worker ended up in trouble with hr, they blammed us both for causing a scene. I texted Laura later asking why, as a friend and lead, did she not say anything? I prefaced the message saying i didnt blame her i just wanted to know why she didnt do anything. She texted back "Dont blame me for your mistake dude. Ive only been lead for three months and i wanted to stay out of it. Next time ya i guess ill fucking say something". I was hurt and said i didnt mean to blame her and i was sorry. She left me on read. then when i went into work she ignored me, slammed stuff, and stormed out when her shift was over. I told her i was going to give us some space and i was going to stay at my boyfriends. She told me fine and to pay her back for the wasted movie ticket we were going to see. I paid her. She didnt text me at all until i ended up sending a lengthy apology. She said she "was sorry for her part too" and that was it.
I finally ended up confronting her when i got back and asked her why she was degrading me and my boyfriend so much. She said she was trying to prepare me for incase he broke up with me since i dont handle sadness well. I told her it had the opposite effect. She then said she thought i wasnt coming back and she cant afford our place alone and its not worth a lot and we wouldnt get anything if we sell and that i "freaked her out" by staying at my boyfriends for three days. I apologized and said i thought she was mad, she said she wasnt mad after the first day. She asked if we were good and i just felt so worn out and didnt want to fight and said sure. But honestly i want to move out and force her to buy me out or sell but my dad is telling me to work it out with her. I just feel sad and almost like shes not my friend anymore? Is there any way to salvage this relationship? Should i? If i move out is our friendship over? Im just so confused and dont know what to do.