27f dating a 27m here.
Let’s start from the beginning, my boyfriend’s family opened up a new franchise in our city. My boyfriend wants to go on opening day and talk to some guys our age there who also own franchises. He’s met them before and said that they were really down to earth and funny so I was completely fine with meeting them. He insisted I come because it’s opening day, so I was fine with coming too.
We get there, meet the guys, and everything’s fine. We’re having small talk when we get on the topic of cars and how I’m looking to buy a new one. The guy, let’s call him (R), tells me I should buy a Tesla. I tell him that my boyfriend and I have a rough experience in a Tesla. We get on the topic of how we slid of the road and wrecked during our two year anniversary. We talk about how I had a concussion for 4 months and I make the joke and say “yeah he tried to kill me with that wreck” and we laugh about it, and explain how the road was icy. We leave the restaurant to go look at cars. we say our goodbye’s and that we’ll be back after we look at vehicles. Everything seems fine until we get out the door and my boyfriend immediately changes tunes and asks me “why I say things like that”. I’m clearly confused and he said that I made him look bad because I said that “he tried to kill me” as a joke to lighten the mood about our traumatic event. He then goes on to say that now they’re going to think he’s weird and not want to work with him because they actually think that he tried to kill his girlfriend via car wreck. I told him that I think his anxiety is getting the best of him and that most people would not think that, especially them because they laughed at it?? He starts yelling at me at one point, as we head towards the car dealership, so I just ask him to take me home because it’s raining. He then heads toward my house and as we’re heading home he’s continuing to go off on me. Then, at a red light, he looks at me and asks if I do it on purpose. I ask what he’s talking about and he says “do you know how it’s going to look now if I go back there without you, after you told them that I tried to kill you?” Insinuating that they’re going to think that he actually killed me??? He then goes on to say that “this is why he doesn’t take me places, because I say stupid shit like this.”
I was so in shock by all of this that I just primarily stayed silent until we got home. He came inside my house and got his things, and then proceeded to pick another fight with me. He came to the living room and asked me why I had told my friends that we didn’t live together at a previous dinner a few days ago. I told him because he doesn’t, he lives at his home for one-two days out of the week. He then goes off to say that “he pays $500 a month for a place that he isn’t even on the lease for”. (For reference, my bills total around $$1800 a month, I just ask that if he stays here then he at least pitch in a little). And I tell him that I don’t feel comfortable putting him on the lease because I have a lot of trust issues from shady stuff that he’s done in the past.
This is where he tells me that coincidentally mg trust issues weren’t too bad when I was considering moving into his parents spare house rent free. I told him that his parents and family would practically harass me to give up my lease to move in with him to save money. I was always the one to tell them that I couldn’t break my lease (that was a lie) but they were the ones who tried to push that onto me. He’s giving sarcastic responses, kinda insinuating that I didn’t care as long as I saved money. I asked him to leave because I needed space and he left, after saying more petty shit as he was leaving.
He then proceeds to call me, and I answer thinking that maybe something happened as he was driving home. He calls me to continue to go off on me, and I’m crying at this point telling him how hurtful it was for him to insinuate that I was essentially a gold digger. He then, digs into that some more and says that I only like his parents because of their restaurant. This comes from a joke that we have about our parents being similar, except one has a restaurant. This joke is one that we both frequently laugh at, so it really caught me off guard that he would turn around and throw that in my face too???
I was just incredibly hurt by all of this that I sent him a long message saying that I was hurt that he thinks of me like that, and I broke up with him. I make double his salary, I have a degree, I’m a senior at my job, I have double the investments that he has, and my parents are decently wealthy. He has no reason to say these things about me. I had 4 jobs during college as a full time student, I worked really hard so that I wouldn’t just be perceived by my looks. I’m really hurt by this but I’m worried that maybe I caused this? I’m honestly pretty lost and worried that I’m in the wrong here, what should I do next?
TLDR; my boyfriend of 2.5 years made an insinuation that I only care about his parents money. Needing advice on next steps