Hey everyone,
I've been working on improving my social skills for the past few years, and I've tried a lot of methods from books (like "How to Win Friends and Influence People"), videos, and other resources. While I've seen great results and feel more charismatic, I've hit a bit of a roadblock and could really use some advice!
The thing is, even though these techniques work amazingly well, I sometimes feel like I'm just a people pleaser. I ask people about themselves and engage in conversations, but it often feels like I'm doing it just because I know it's supposed to make me more likable, not because I genuinely care. This makes me feel unsatisfied with myself and a bit like a terrible person. 😕
It’s a weird situation because trying to be charismatic is actually making me feel less charismatic! I end up feeling like shit and it’s really affecting my self-worth and self-respect.
What I'm really struggling with is finding a middle ground. I want to be a genuinely kind and charismatic person without feeling like I'm losing my sense of self. How can I balance being interested in others and staying true to myself? For example, the book emphasizes asking people about themselves, which makes sense, but it just feels so forced and insincere to me.
Has anyone else dealt with this? How did you manage to find a balance between being charismatic and authentic? Any tips or advice would be greatly appreciated!