Hey guys , I (21F) struggle immensely with attachment issues and being clingy I’m a huge limerick as well , the first man I fell in love with was unemotionally available , never texted me , never called me, he was abusive with his words and mean. I fell in love with a man who I never dated he never gave a shit about me , it was unrequited the feelings I had. He would only call me up for sex he was also my first everything kiss, hand holding, etc. to say the least my experience with him shaped how I see relationships now. Here I am a few months later and I have met a (26M) we have spent every Sunday together for three weeks , the whole day. He takes me out ,he buys me meals, he asks me questions, he listens to me, he’s interested in me. He doesn’t call me any names, he’s very respectful. He maintains contact throughout the week, he wants to help me with my problems, the feelings are growing slowly. I mean he is the dream guy. And yet here I am occasionally thinking of my past lover (27M) ,some of our experiences together, and I miss him. We would talk about deeper issues in between our sexy time lol there was no fluff ,no entourage, we were completely naked with earth other telling dark secrets, within the first week we knew each other we already had a huge argument like a couple going on 10 years. There was unbridled passion but the respect for me ran dry every time I saw him so I decided to end things. But now I want to try move forward, How can you bring excitement to a healthy relationship? Why do I feel so bored ? I don’t want to screw things up with him , but I’m also having a hard time transferring some of my passionate energy to him. I want to be healthy.
TLDR : I finally met a healthy partner I’m bored as fuck how to rise above my stupid feelings ?