Not too sound like I'm seeking out respect, but more to understand why I feel like I don't get the same level of it that my peers get from my friends.
As of late I've noticed more and more that some interactions with certain friends/coworkers tend to leave me feeling worse after talking to them. There are things I catch that have become a bit of a pattern and I want to know if I'm being crazy or if this is something I should consider.
I'm in an ongoing group chat with a bunch of my coworkers that have become my friends. Two of them have known each other longer, and have a deeper bond than I do with either of them. Sometimes when we're all having a conversation, I contribute and am often left with either an invalidating comment, a disagreement, or just being ignored. This has happened quite a few times.
This group also likes to complain about random things a lot. Like a LOT. To the point where it's annoying. No one minds when they do it — but if I say anything to sound like I've been annoyed, they seemingly turn on me and tell me to suck it up. Or say that I complain too much. I feel crazy when this happens. I don't understand what I'm doing wrong. Am I not doing what they are?
Some specific instances that led me to believe this:
I was joking around with a friend who was feeling down about being in a fight with another friend, and he "jokingly"(?) told me that "I could never offend him". Could be taken as a good thing too.. but unsure with the context I've experienced.
They tend to make "jokes" about my work ethic. I've once been told, as a "joke", that between two of us, one was a better worker and the other, not so much. My friend made it clear who he was referring to. I've also once been "joked" at that "they don't care what I think", after I tried voicing my opinion on something work related.
I do know that there are times where I may accidentally say something that comes off as dumb, and I'm fully aware of it after the fact. I'm unsure if this is ruining my credibility in some way.
Just to add — I do think I'm good at my job, I've been told that often. Though taken with a grain of salt.
I don't feel this way with other friends that I have, whatsoever. It's mostly this specific group that leaves me always feeling confused and sometimes hurt. Maybe intentional? I'm not sure. They include me in things that they plan (movies, birthdays, etc), so I come back thinking they will be different, or nicer.