Okay heres the deal, I'm 23 M and my GF is 22 F , weve been together for 7 months. She has had a really tough week in university + her mother has had a sudden health issue. My GF is an older sibling of 4 and has been super busy with studies, taking care of her mom and her siblings. The thing is , she's been dealing with all of this for a week and our communication has been completely cut off, she didn't even tell me about what was going on with her mother until today and that was only in a short Whatsapp message.
We are both firm believers that having a strong stream of communication is crucial to a relationship and so is being transparent with each other.
It feels like she doesn't seem comfortable relying on me and coming to me for support, even though I love her so much and would do anything to help and support her during these hard times. Evidentally, she didn't even update me about something so crucial that's been going on with her and the only reason I think she did was because I was being adamant on insisting we talk for a few minutes since I was thinking she was so busy with studies and nothing else was going on so a few minutes to chill and talk on the phone wouldn't be a big deal.
I know that in a similar situation I would make sure to find a few minutes in the day to talk to her and tell her about what's going on, making sure she knows that she's important and I am trusting of her support, especially during hard times.
The idea that she doesn't trust me enough and doesn't naturally engage with me when she needs the most support is devastating for me, it's my number one responsibility to be a supportive and helpful partner, especially when she is in such a tough few days, and now that this seed of doubt has crossed my mind and that my perception of how she trusts me has been compromised, I frankly feel like garbage.
How should I approach the situation? She is in a really tough time and I really don't think I should approach her with all of this now since it would be selfish to her situation with her mother and she really is burdened right now with all of it. But on the other hand I believe that this disconnect of our stream of communication can really harm the relationship and I feel horrible about it.
I also deeply respect her parents and want her mother to recover quickly and fully.
I don't blame my GF at all for the lack of communication and her not taking a few minutes to talk on the phone, she is definitely NOT AT FAULT for this.
My problem is that she subconsciously doesn't see me as someone that she can find comfort and support from, especially during hard times, since evidentally she hasn't talked to me about it or seeked support from me. She is definitely anxious and having a hard time so she definitely needs some form of support and help.
I won't be able to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't see me as a reliable and desired person to seek help and mental support from.
How should I approach her about this? I'm afraid that waiting will cause more harm to the relationship but I don't want to burden her when she's during this difficult time.