So I’ve been reading for the past month people on here saying I’m not attracted to someone and should I be with them? The answer is if you’re not physically attracted to someone you should probably not be dating them. Also I’ve been reading on here people saying that they are a nice person so they deserve someone. You are falling for a nice guy and nice girl syndrome. Just because you are a nice person does not mean you deserve someone or that you deserve a specific type of treatment. You have been conditioned to think if you act a certain way then you should wage some type of results from it and that is super toxic. Take it from someone who has always thought because I’m a good person things should happen to me and happen for me and that’s wrong. Basically you have false expectations of people in life. I would say if you want a healthy dating life that you need to do your best communicate effectively and learn from bad experiences or good experiences. But if for any reason you think that you should yield results or gain something because oh I did such and such you are wrong and sadly mistaken. I hope this helps someone it’s just what I’ve been noticing and it kind of frightens me that all of you think this way and that no one has spoken up and told you and been honest with you that just because you look a certain way or act a certain way or because whatever you should get certain results or wages
1 comment
I definitely agree. The title is misleading though, I thought this was a question post asking for advice but i’m bot totally sure what it actually is.
I do, however, think that a lot of people in relationships see them as a transactional thing. I love you, but i’m also doing xyz for you therefore i deserve xyz/you should love and appreciate me. While it makes sense, this shouldn’t actually be the train of thought nor the basis of dating – unconditional love should. Doing something for someone simply because you know they’ll appreciate/like it or because you want to, not for their reaction/reciprocation. Yes, you deserve and need that in a relationship, but it should be unconditional as well, not a response to your bid of affection.