My wife (30F) and I (30M) have had an ongoing debate about having another child for about a year now. We have two children now (ages 11 & 4) but she insists on having a third. However, I’m opposed to that idea. I feel like it would be too much of a financial and mental struggle for us to take on. I’ve explained my reasoning, but it’s very emotional for her. She isn’t concerned with the X’s & O’s, she just says we’ll figure it out.
Today she told me that although she loves me and doesn’t want to end things, we’ll be getting a divorce if I won’t have another child with her. I don’t think it’s fair but she doesn’t think not having another baby with her is fair either.
I don’t want a divorce, but I don’t agree with having a child I don’t want that would push us to the limit in many areas of our life. And that’s assuming is a single, healthy baby; let alone if we wound up having a child with special needs or multiples.
I think we are capable of being cordial should we separate and she’s a good mother. But I’m just really stuck here bc I know having a child I don’t think I can accommodate is a bad move. But I also feel like getting a divorce is also a bad move.
If I don’t go through with another baby and we get divorced, do you think I’m making a mistake or will deeply regret my decision?
Tl;dr wife wants a divorce if I don’t have a third child with her even though I think it’s a bad idea.