The title is everything. At my absolute worst, from being an academic topper to being unemployed, slipping into depression, and whatnot, the regret is killing me. Now, it's not that I lack self-awareness. I know everything that needs to be done to get myself out of this pit but it's just that my brain doesn't want to. The constant wish to do better and the inability to do anything is eating me alive. Anyone who has gone through this phase, help me figure out the way ahead.


5 comments

  2. I was there at 25. Absolute lowest point of my life.

    My advice is to stop looking for motivation. It’s a mistake to only try to make progress on your “good” days. Good days aren’t guaranteed; start focusing more on discipline: Do what you need to do simply because it needs to be done. I know I’m making it sound simpler than it is, but this mindset is what got me out of that rut.

    Also, take care of your mental health. Exercise helps with this _a lot_. It’s the only thing that got me off anti-depressants. Reserve some time for yourself to just relax and rest. For me, it’s every Sunday.

    An additional thing that helped me was making my bed every morning. It sets the “productive tone” for the rest of the day. I read about this idea from somewhere, don’t remember from where though.

    Lastly, trust that this will pass. I’m in my early 30s now and life is better than it’s ever been. But I still remember 25-28 being absolutely horrible for me. Looking back, it’s hard to imagine that I was ever in that position seeing where I’m at today.

    You got this, man. Most of us go through something like this at some point in our lives. It’s a very normal thing to experience.

  3. I’d also recommend going to church/faithbased place &/volunteering(anywhere). Getting perspective of others lives helps to put your own life in perspective and truly shows you what’s really important.

  4. Can relate.
    1. get out of bed
    2. when you do get up, before you do anything else, make your bed. Doesn’t have to be perfect, but at least make it neat.
    That’ll stop you from climbing back into it.
    3. Get out of the house, even if just for a few minutes.
    4. for the next 6 months, if anyone invites you to go out of your house and do something, just say yes. That movement will make everything else flow from there

    And good luck friend

  5. If you’re afloat and have food/housing while being unemployed, this isn’t a low, this is where you figure out what’s ahead. And ultimately as you find more advice and guidance, it’s what you choose to do with it. To me, most of progress comes when you stop obsessing over some timeline of you, because beyond close friends/family, no one thinks about your timeline. So while you do use it to inform your life, if you use it to limit yourself, then it does no good to reflect on it as a tangible subject. It’s not tangible, the time has passed, beyond taking what you’ve learned from your timeline.

    What’s wrong with having a lull? It’s part of the human experience. Experience the lull, and pull yourself up from it with a new direction, and know it won’t be clear. Just don’t obsess over the lull like it’s a feeling that needs to be explored…that’s how you stay there.

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