To those who had a partner who DIDN’T go to uni but you did, how did it go?

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1. I didn’t, but in the vast, vast majority of cases the couple breaks up. This isn’t meant to spite those who did make it; I’m very happy for them, but they are the exception

2. We didn’t get far. But everytime we got into an argument he would throw it in my face. He would argue that I felt superior to him because I went to college and he didn’t. This man made a bit more than 3x what I made. But it was I guess his biggest insecurity. Yeah we didn’t work out.

3. I (34F) got my Bachelor’s in nursing. My parents are Asian immigrants and it was ingrained over and over that I *had* to get a perfect grades and a college degree to be successful. So I did. YOUNG me would never have even considered dating, let alone marrying, someone without a college degree.

   My husband (40M) had the opposite experience. His parents didn’t care about his education, so he didn’t either. But he grew up both passionate about computers and artistically gifted. He grew up in the 80s basically spending all his time on the computer, teaching himself how to code, design websites, etc. He barely graduated (I was shocked because he’s quite smart!) and basically viewed everything else in school as useless, lol.

   He didn’t have the money or desire to get a college degree, so he did some “classes” for a diploma because that’s what jobs wanted. He said the classes could barely be called that since very old men were teaching even older information, so he ended up relying on what he already knew.

   Fast forward: we met each other eight years ago. I was making great money and fucking hated my job. He was making even greater money and loved his job. Now I’m a stay at home wife and he works from home. My life is nothing how I pictured it would be… and I’m so happy.

4. For me, it wasn’t about the level of education, but the financial strain. I only went to college, but I got a well paid job and was the breadwinner. My ex never completed college, but had an entitled mind set and it _killed him_ to do unskilled work at minimum wage, so he never held down a job. He claimed if he got better education, he’d have better work prospects, but I don’t know if that’s true. I think he just hated working and knew I’d hold down the fort.

   On the flipside, my current husband has a Masters degree and spent the first 10 years of our relationship in school. At some point, a similar pattern started happening where I was supporting him while he was doing his education, and he’d complain about every job he got to get by while waiting for his certification. He quit a lot of jobs because he couldn’t handle the stress while doing school full time. It became really stressful for me and we went to couples counseling to get back on the same page. Our relationship is a lot better now and he’s put in an effort to not put all the responsibility on me, and he finally finished his schooling almost a year ago and has a decent paying job.

   The only difference between these scenarios is that one partner recognized they needed to pull their weight, and the other did not. It didn’t have much to do with education, but if one person is making less money than the other, they still should make an effort to contribute financially, imo. I don’t expect my partner to pay the same towards our lifestyle and I’ll cover luxury items. But not having stable income or being able to afford your own cellphone bill, is a line I draw.

5. Together five years. We do well for ourselves. We work very similar jobs and contribute similar amounts of money. Only time he’d consider a degree would be for a promotion down the line, but many jobs don’t care anymore about degrees as long as you have success stories and management experience. Both of which he has.

   I don’t think education level matters. Hard work matters. Intellect matters. Can he hustle when push comes to shove? Does he have marketable skills? Can he have intelligent conversation and think critically? That’s what really matters to me, and university isn’t for everyone.

6. I have a Masters degree, my partner of 7 years has a few certificates he got through work, but no formal higher education. It’s never mattered at all. He’s incredibly intelligent, has a good, high paying job and is a wonderful person. He just got a job straight out of high school and built a career out of it. 
   I work at a university, and while degrees are useful and necessary for certain jobs, they don’t tell you anything about a person. I know lots of great, smart, interesting people without them (and with them as well of course) and a lot of narrow minded, shitty people with them. 
   tl;dr doesn’t matter at all, my partner is awesome (and makes more than I do anyways, and doesn’t have a to repay a student loan either!) 

7. I’m drowning in student loans with a masters degree and he earns twice as much as I do as a community college dropout. We have a great marriage and education has never been an issue. 

8. I’ve been married for about 3 years. I have a degree and he doesn’t. It’s never been an issue for us. He’s incredibly intelligent, but never had the opportunity to go to uni (he’s American, I’m Australian). My mother, who believes education is the most important thing a person can have, did not like the fact he didn’t go to uni, and discouraged the relationship in the beginning. I just ignored her. Other than that, it never gets brought up in our relationship.

9. In the UK uni doesn’t mean much unless you go on to a masters / PHD and have a steadfast career path. I never finished my degree and breadwinner, husband finished his and took a lot longer for him to find a career path