My boyfriend (15m) wants me (16m) to ask if I can kiss him everytime. Like literally I have to say “can I kiss you?” Everytime I want to kiss him.
Is that normal? My friend says he’s not into me, my brother says he’s just fucking weird. When I ask him why he wants me to ask everytime, he says “just ask”, or “I just wanna be asked first”
I guess I wanna know is this normal, I sign maybe he’s not really into me and should I just forget about it even though it’s annoying,
14 comments
Is he out to everyone in his life?
It’s weird. If you don’t like it then don’t date him, that’s a deal breaker for me. Actually, is he fully out? Are you his first boyfriend? Maybe it’s an insecurity thing?
Yeah nah that’s not one bit normal.
Does he like to kiss you and ask every time?
Consent is a must when you’re trying to do physical stuff with your partner. Learn from your bf.
If he wasn’t into you, I don’t think he’d kiss you at all. Does he kiss you back when you ask?
He could have some trauma from his past and that’s why he wants you to ask first.
Or it could be something as simple as he forgets to brush his teeth sometimes so he wants you to ask first just in case he forgot that day?
Is he traumatized? If not then it’s not normal but still to each their own. You have to decide if you want to have to deal with this behaviour or not. It’s not like you can kiss him without his consent, he’s made that clear.
we’ll, guys don’t have to like a girl to kiss them.
my guess, it makes him feel in control. i would find a nicer guy to call you bf before he escalates(assuming i’m correct) goodluck!
Soooo…. You don’t want to have consent first?
Look, there’s nothing wrong with a heads up in the form of an ask. He could have past trauma, he could just not like being touched and has to have a second to adjust.
Hell, my husband and I have been married just about 10 years now, and we still ask for hugs/kisses about 99% of the time. We also ask out kids first as well.
That’s his consent boundary. If you don’t like it, move on. It is his body. You don’t have a right to it.
Idk maybe he’s just setting boundaries
It’s ok for him to have a boundary, and it’s ok for that boundary to take the form of consent.
He may have trauma, he may not. That’s irrelevant.
Point is, it’s his boundary.
Now, are you obliged to want to be with someone with a boundary you find odd, cumbersome or annoying? No. But you must respect it.
You can respect it by asking for consent each time OR by breaking up, and never ridiculing him about it, to him or anyone else.
That would get annoying real quick for me.
he has his boundaries and this one may just not be considered “normal” for you