ive (21m) been with my boyfriend (21m) for going on 2 years now. Things started off as a one night stand and kind of just escalated from there. ive always been a very big fan of sex/sex positive and even though I don’t have a ton of experience with so many people, it’s still fun and feels easy to do. my boyfriend had much more experience than i did when we met but that didn’t bother me. he was ALSO a very sexual person, but as we got further into our relationship, that started to taper off for him.
he says it’s because of a lot of things, including sex feeling less necessary now that he doesn’t have anything to prove (ouch), feeling less confident in his body (im a pre-op pre-t trans man so i understand this, but he constantly tells me to love the body im in) and overall just not being in the mood/being tired.
ive been told from him and his friends that he was extremely sexual in his last relationships, so it’s almost impossible to not take it personally. He’s told me im “sex-obsessed” to the point where it’s unhealthy, but I feel like if there’s any time to be this way, it’s when I’m young and finally comfortable enough to actually do it. It’s probably the biggest point of contention in our relationship and I don’t know how to make it better. it’s made me feel so unattractive and worthless. Am I taking it too personally/in the wrong here? Is this a dealbreaker for a relationship? im lost.
1 comment
Your feelings are valid, and whether or not it’s a deal breaker is ultimately up to you. Every relationship is different so for some, the lack of sex is a deal breaker but for others it’s something that can be over looked, so for that question you’re going to get tons of different answers. In the end you really gotta ask yourself “is this something I can live with or is something that I simply can’t overlook”
Don’t see his lack of sexual interest make you feel any negative feelings towards yourself. Their own choices reflect nothing on your appearance and/or worth.