TL;DR Any tips on how my wife and i sort out where to live?
We've been Married 6 years, lived together for 10, including dating been together 11 years.
Since the pandemic my wife and I are both remote workers and it won't be going back to in person. Both of our offices have been permanently closed. We have no kids and no family here. We currently live in Orange county California, where she is originally from. I'm from the midwest and would like to move somewhere cheaper where our money can go farther and maybe retire early. I've dealt with terrible midwest winters and don't want to go back to that, but somewhere else in the southwest us where winters are mild and we have most of the city things we have in OC is where i'm thinking. My wife on the other hand has never lived outside LA/San Diego area. Shes having a hard time even entertaining the idea of moving. The weather here is great no argument. But the cost of living (we have a little condo) is insane compared to the rest of the US. Our money will just go so much farther and we'll have most of the same stuff we have here city wise. Plus theres always travel.
I'm certain we aren't the only couple in a situation similar to this since so many people became remote during the pandemic. Any tips for working this out?
6 comments
There are remote worker incentives all over the US, maybe start there
Have you thought of taking some small vacations to the southwest to visit the area and see what it offers? Check out the area, the cost of living and the state taxes. See what you can get vs what you are able to afford now.
Also make sure you check with both of your employers that your are able to move. There was another post on here a few days ago about a guy that wasn’t allowed to move even though he was 100% remote. This has to do with the state tax laws and the way his company is set up.
Both separately write down the pros and cons of moving/staying and openly discuss them. That means both you need to go in with an open mind that neither of you right. Both of you get a say in what’s important to them, and no value judging. For example, money isn’t a priority to her. But what is a priority to her? Money isn’t everything. For her, maybe its a priority to stay with her friends and family. And there is value in that too.
I’d definitely travel around northern New Mexico and Arizona where the elevation gets you a decent climate and in some areas have MCOL’s.
You can get hosed w remote work, be somewhere that you can bounce to a new role.
Get to a list of 4 cities then spend 2 weeks in each one on Airbnb/vrbo/hotel.
Some people I know have gotten sudden salary reductions due to ‘cost of living adjustment’, so you want to really watch out for that, too.