bf (24M) and i (22F) are medschool classmates. We had been together for 2 years and had an amazing connection in the beginning but due to a few mistakes and incompatibility issues, things are not seeming to work out. He used to be a super kind, sweet and generous guy and still is but now he has started to have sudden bouts of anger regarding everything i do and has ended things between us multiple times because of them. The most recent one was about a week ago but i begged him to stay because i realised that i had made a few mistakes in the relationship and would like to work on them. He calmed down for a few days but then came the main reason for his anger spells and breakup. Basically, our colleagues decided to do a research together and since we are a part of the group, we were added. so it involves completing the set tasks within a certain time limit and whoever does so gets a better chance at a higher authorship. so i was calming him down regarding a matter he was distressed about and then the group call to discuss about the research happened. he asked me to join but he wasn’t gonna because he was tired. i told him we will join together or else i wont either. he kept asking me to join so i did but i also joined from another device with his name so his absent doesn’t get marked and his ranking doesn’t drop. he got extremely upset and said that the research mattered to you MORE than the distressing situation i was in and you couldn’t skip it to comfort me. the thing is that i had been comforting him for the past 2 hours and by the end of it he really was getting better so i joined the said meeting. He got so angry about this that he blocked me from whatsapp and instagram despite me calling him multiple times. He unblocked the following morning and the same thing happened that night too, but he had informed me prior that i don’t need to join the meeting on his behalf. i joined again but was constantly in an argument with him so couldn’t listen anything. Anyways, he joined to see if i had joined even if he hadn’t, got angry and repeated the same blocking cycle, he also said that i had prompted him to leave the research because of my behaviour and he exited the group. He came back the next day tho and then got angry about me doing my assigned work on the shared google sheet, which he could also view. He called me and got extremely angry again about the research mattering more to me than him and used foul language. he said that i wanted to be ranked higher so i was doing my work while he couldn’t because he was so distressed and that he will fail at everything and a bunch of other things. he also said that he couldn’t understand how someone going through a breakup could do these things. it has been 2 days since this shared project and he has been calling me everyday accusing me of the same stuff again and again. I am really reaching my limit. I just want to leave this project just so i wont be accused again and again for doing work. I am doubting myself too that why am i able to do work after things have ended between us and if i am a shitty person for focusing on work despite my life going downhill and if what we had didn’t matter to me as much just because i am able to find distraction in work. Apart from that, i have cried multiple times and am feeling extremely bad and regretful for my mistakes and what could have been.
what should i do? Should i leave the project so that his constant nagging can stop? even if i do leave it, i know he will feel guilty and ask me to join again. or should i keep on working and present myself as the bad guy who doesn’t give a shit about anything else. But when i work, that pisses him off too. I seriously don’t know what to do.
TL;DR: bf keep nagging and accusing me of work mattering more than him after he broke up with me in anger, asking for advice if i should continue with working on the project or drop it so he can just leave me be.