TL;DR Had a falling out with a friend months ago, and our friendship is recovering but not back to normal. I miss them a lot (talking to them, hanging out with them) and still feel sad, even hurt, about our “new normal”. How do I share this with them without being too clingy?
A friend (26M) and I (30M) had some misunderstandings a few months ago, which resulted in us barely talking for 6 weeks (he needed space from me). We’re now back on speaking terms, but he asked that we don't rehash the past.
We’ve hung out thrice since then (over a 4-month period). He said he still values me as a friend, but I do sense he's now uncomfortable(?) around me, even if he won’t admit it.
In particular, our hangouts are much shorter and less frequent now, and he only wants to meet at the venue separately (when I always used to pick him up and drop him off). When we hangout, the “depth” of conversation is still the same. We still talk about personal matters and “vulnerable” things, not just shallow conversation.
We also talk less frequently since the falling out. We used to exchange DMs nearly everyday or every other day. Nowadays, the replies are sporadic (can take up to a week). I feel like I put in 70% of the effort, but he tends to initiate after a long silence (like after a week of not talking). He knows how much I value our DMs (we've talked about it before), so the lack of replies is killing me.
I miss the friendship we had, and although we’re still friends, we’re not as close as before. I don’t know if it will ever go back to normal. I miss talking to him and being able to spend more time with him. It is eating me inside. I want to tell him how the distance is painful and that I miss him, but not sure how without being too clingy. Help?