Alternatively, what is something a woman has said/done that made you want to marry her?

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1. She laughed at stupid juvenile jokes then talked Football like a sports fan. I openly described her as “like a dude with tits.”

2. She was emotionally stable.

3. Be willing to have me!

4. The first thing that drew me to my wife was that she was very thoughtful, in that she stopped and thought about what she wanted to say before she actually said it. I wasn’t used to it and I loved it.

   I also absentmindedly farted in a hotel lobby and she burst out laughing instead of being mad or grossed out, and that was the moment I knew she was the one

5. She never let a little neuraldivergent cringe ruin a good time.

6. She dated me when I made way less than her.

7. Nothing. When I appreciated things women said or did, I didn’t think about marriage; my emotions are just not wired up to the concept of marriage. When I did decide to get married, I was just integrating over the whole person and the whole relationship and thought there were practical reasons to get married.

8. Heres something another woman did that made me decide my wife was a keeper. 

   After 18m dating my now wife, i had snapchats from someone who had prev. With. Basically on a plate. Ive never been a cheater but the fact i wasnt even tempted told me a lot about how i felt about my now wife. 

   Was just a moment that made me step back and think about how i felt and how serious it was and the future. 

   Obv the other person got some stern words and a block. I then deleted snapchat, feels more of a single person app. 

9. This is (was almost) so fucking dumb but…

   I had been dating this girl going on 5 or 6 years. I never subscribed to the idea of marriage. I’m not religious, and didn’t see a lot of marriages work out in my life. We were coasting along. Things are good, not great, but incredibly stable and we were building each other up very well.

   I was totally off the market. I’ve never been a cheater, nor one to even humor the idea of entertaining another woman while I’m dating someone. I’m monogamous to a fault.

   …until this chick comes into my job. Her name was Cat. She worked for one of my regular customers. Probably the only time I’ve been tongue tied talking to a girl. I definitely tripped over my words a few times.

   She wasn’t… Conventionally beautiful. Don’t get me wrong, smoking hot, but not Baywatch kind of pretty. Rough around the edges. She was probably 6′ and fairly well built. Like.. hard work built. Lean, but some serious strength in her bones. She shot shit with me like any of my regular hardened blue collar customers, but she had an heir of flirtiness about her.

   Over the few times we talked I realized she was super cool. Definitely dangerous for my relationship, and I skirted around several questions.

   She comes in a few more times over the following months. I noticed she was a lot more direct and serious with my coworkers.

   She comes in one final time. Asked for me personally to load up her car with material.

   Paraphrasing, but the conversation went as such:

   Her: “Ignore the mess, I’m living in here until I move to (whatever state, can’t remember)”

   Me: “hey no worries, gotta do what you gotta do”

   Her: “yeah, good thing no one is riding along, but I could probably squeeze someone else in here if they wanted”

   …And she winked then stared a fucking hole into me. It felt like 5 minutes of pure silence.

   I nervously laughed and told her safe travels if I didn’t see her again, like a fucking choir boy.

   She never outright verbalized for me to come with her. But I’ve got to be honest. If she had just said “hop in were going to Washington together” …man, I think I might have done it. It would have been reckless, and absolutely the dumbest thing I ever did… But when she left that day (the last time I ever saw her) I was in a weird funk for over a week. I don’t believe in any kind of master plan, but I’ve always wondered if that put me in, or kept me out of some weird alternate timeline.

10. I joked, “It might be a few years before I start earning a reasonable salary” when I received my PhD offer. My wife, who was my girlfriend at the time, immediately said, “I can raise you with my paycheck.”

11. We did a week long canoe trip around a chain of lakes – 120km including 10km of portages. We ran out of food two days early (peanut butter on tortillas was all we had). It rained for 3 days straight. At the end we had to drag our canoe through 500 meters of thigh-deep mud (beavers had dammed upstream).

    She didn’t complain once. She reveled in it. She was indomitable.

    Our next paddle trip, I proposed and we conceived our son.

12. When we were dating my wife would just up and tell me all the things she thought were wonderful about me. We’d be laying in bed with her head on my shoulder and she’d just go on and on complimenting me. I didn’t know at that time what love languages were but found out later that words of affirmation are strongly one of mine.

    One of the first times this happened, I was experiencing almost what felt like an orgasm but in my brain. Like her words were making me so happy it felt like I was on drugs – euphoric. I’d never felt anything like it. I thought at that moment that, “Yeah, I think I’m going to try to marry this woman.”

13. Third date at a Vietnamese restaurant. She took a spicy chicken wing, popped it in her mouth, chewed a bit, and pulled out a bare bone.